


The Soldier and the Intern

by theslothofdoom



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: I'm terrified, M/M, My first fic, Oblivious af, Please Review, Universe Alteration, darcy's long lost cousin, gotta get those science credits, gotta show that glorious chest, he's just trying to live, pietro is alive because i said so, poor gavin is an awkward boi, two puppers who desperately need a hug, winter soldier is amused
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-18
Updated: 2018-09-24
Packaged: 2019-06-28 23:37:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 24,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15717411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theslothofdoom/pseuds/theslothofdoom
Summary: Gavin Willoughby, in need of some science credits for university, applies for an internship at HYDRA Industries, a well known technology conglomerate. Unbeknownst to him, HYDRA is actually a terrorist organization. They recruit Gavin to help them perform menial tasks. One of these tasks include maintaining the highly dangerous Winter Soldier.Based on the idea from plain-flavoured-english. Link: http://plain-flavoured-english.tumblr.com/post/133153394004/one-of-my-favorite-things-in-the-world-is-that





	1. The Interview

Gavin shifted nervously in his chair. He fiddled with his gloves as he looked around the room. The walls were a dark green with a single dim light over a steel table. Across from him was a one-way mirror on the right of the door. 

He felt like he was being interrogated for a police investigation rather than a job interview.

Gavin couldn’t believe his luck. An internship popped up when HYDRA Industries announced they would be working with the Russian government on a research project. Hundreds of people applied for the internship, and out of all the candidates, he was chosen to be interviewed. Plain, average Gavin was chosen as a potential intern for well-known tech company HYDRA Industries. A part of him was hopeful that he would get the job, but most of him was pretty sure that they’d reject him. Still, he was pretty grateful for such an opportunity. If it didn’t work out, he would search and apply for more internships. He just needed to get enough science credits to graduate. 

The door slammed open, startling Gavin. His heart beat wildly as a stern-looking man with a deep-set frown walked in. He was tall, roughly six feet tall, with slicked brown hair and gray eyes. He was wearing a black army uniform, with a strange symbol on his armband. Gavin shifted to get a better look, but before he could catch a good glimpse, the man sat in down in front of him with a loud thud. Gavin gulped and straightened his posture.

Show time.

He watched as the man open the folder and shuffled through some papers. After he finished shuffling through, the man put his arms on the table and crossed his arms, staring right into Gavin’s eyes. It took every ounce of willpower in Gavin to not look away. They stared at each other in an uncomfortable silence, until the man cleared his throat and began to speak.

“You are Gavin Willoughby, am I correct? 22 years old and currently studying at Arcadia University with a double major in microbiology and sociology?” A slight Russian accent was heard in his voice. Gavin shakily ran his fingers through his hair.

“Um, y-yes, that’s correct.” The man leaned back into his chair.

“Tell me a little bit about yourself, Mr. Willoughby. Why should we hire you?”

“I-I am resourceful and knowledgeable... um, I previously interned at my university’s biotech lab, so I’m pretty good at organizing files and analyzing data. I also have experiencing inputting data into a computer system, namely PC and Apple. I am currently learning how to use StarkTech,” Gavin said. “My experience working in my university’s lab should be enough to make me a good candidate for this job.” _Oh no_ , Gavin thought. _Was that the wrong thing to say?_

The man raised an eyebrow. “Alright then, what made you decide to apply for this job?”

“Well, to be honest, I need the science credits in order to graduate. I figured that this would be a great way for me to earn the credits. Plus, I want to have more experience working in a lab.” 

The man pursed his lips and tilted his head, deep in thought. He sat up and folded his hands on the desk, looking straight into Gavin’s eyes. He hoped the man didn’t see the fear in his eyes. After what seemed to be an eternity, the man cleared his throat.

“Alright, since you have a pretty solid resumé and your background check was cleared, you’re hired.” Gavin looked up, eye widened in disbelief. It was almost too easy. Too quick. 

“Really? I got the internship?” The man nodded.

“Yes. Unfortunately, you won’t be working in a lab immediately,” the man said. Gavin’s face fell. “You will start off by doing menial tasks such as filing away reports and running errands. After a month, you will be able to work in a lab.” _Okay_ , thought Gavin. _Sounds pretty reasonable._

“Since the internship requires you to live on site, you’re living expenses will be covered. There are some forms you need to sign, but that can be done after you have moved in. This job also requires complete confidentiality. You will be allowed to contact your loved ones outside of the lab in the neighboring town, but you are not allowed to speak any details about your job and employers. Doing so will result in immediate consequences.” Gavin inwardly shivered, but nodded. Of course there was a catch. Gavin felt a spike of anxiety, but pushed down the feeling. He really needed the credits.

“Got it. Is there anything else I need to know?” The man pulled out an envelope seemingly out of nowhere and slid it towards him. Gavin picked it up and was surprised to see a bunch of cash inside.

“It wasn’t mentioned on the website, but the internship is paid and allows for half of your salary to be given to you now. Your salary will always be in cash. Any questions?” Gavin shook his head. The man stood up. “Great. This meeting is over. If you have any questions later, ask for Lieutenant Alexei Vasiliev.”

Gavin stood up and shook the lieutenant’s hand enthusiastically. “Thank you, lieutenant, thank you so much!” Before Gavin could leave, Lieutenant Vasiliev put a hand on his shoulder. Gavin turned around, face scrunched up in confusion.

“Your mother, she is a beautician, yes?” Gavin nodded his head warily.

“Did you ever work there?” Gavin narrowed his eyes. Where was he going with his?

“Y-yes, I worked with my mother at her salon. I used to work at the front desk, and sometimes she would ask me to help her wax or shave a client. Why do you ask?”

“No reason. I was just curious. See you around, Mr. Willoughby. I look forward to working with you.” Gavin nodded and mumbled a half-hearted reply. As he began walking out of the building, he scrunched up his face. He managed to get a glimpse of the symbol on the lieutenant’s armband. It was a skull with multiple tentacles protruding out.

 _Strange_ , Gavin thought. _I’m going to have to look into that._


	2. The Calm Before the Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gavin starts working. What he doesn't know is that he's in for a surprise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, it's Sloth again! I've come back with another chapter. Also, if I made a grammatical or any kind of mistake, please feel free to let me know.
> 
> Thank you for reading, and have a nice day!

“He gave you the job just like that?” Gavin sat outside the café, a hot chocolate in his hand. He decided to call his best friend, Taylor, the good news. She was at university taking summer classes while Gavin left to pursue the internship. Unfortunately, she wasn’t as excited as he was.

“Why are you so skeptical? He did a background check and everything! It’s totally fine.” Taylor sighed on the other end of the phone.

“I don’t know man, it just seems a little suspicious to me. He asked like, what, two to three questions then decided to hire you? Doesn’t that seem fishy to you?” Well, she wasn’t entirely wrong. The fact that he was hired after a few questions without hesitation definitely left him suspicious. But Gavin desperately needed those credits, and he wasn’t going to apply for another internship when he didn’t absolutely need to.

“I know you’re worried Tay, but trust me on this. I only have to spend the summer as an intern, and I’ll be back before you know it. Plus, they’re paying me-- with real cash!” 

“Whatever floats your boat, my dude,” said Taylor. “Just let me know if they start harassing you, okay? I’ll beat the shit outta them!” 

Gavin smiled. He knew he could trust Taylor. “Thanks, you’re the best. Call you later, Tay.” 

“I know. Call ya later, Gav. Buh-bye!” Gavin sighed and put down his phone. He received an email from HYDRA Industries that he was to move in within 5 days. 

Better get packing.

* * *

Gavin managed to put the heavy box down. He stood up and stretched his back in relief. Thank god that was the last box. Today marked the day he officially moved in. As he began taking out items from the boxes and putting them away, he heard a knock on his door. When he opened it, he was greeted by the sight of a 20-something year old man with platinum blond hair and gray eyes. He had a large grin on his face.

“Hey man, what’s up?. You’re the new intern… right?” Gavin nodded.

“Awesome! The name’s Jonathan Knepp. I live down the hall from you. I’m also an intern, but I’ve been here for three years. Can I come inside?” 

Gavin opened the door and motioned for Jonathan to sit on his bed. As they starting talking, Gavin found out that they both were from Riverside, California and coincidentally lived on the same street when they were kids. They also shared a love for chocolate and historical movies. Jonathan was 26 years old and had two younger sisters. His father worked as a cashier at the local grocery market, and his mother washes dishes at a semi-popular restaurant for a living. He threw his head back when laughing and bit his knuckles when he was anxious. While they were talking, Jonathan noticed that Gavin kept fiddling with his gloves. 

“Dude, why do you keep wearing those gloves? It’s super hot outside, and there’s no need to wear them indoors. So what’s the deal?” Jonathan asked, glancing at the gloves curiously. Gavin looked away and ran a hand through his hair.

“U-um, I have a horrible rash on my hands,” mumbled Gavin. “Plus, I just feel more comfortable with them on. A-anyways, you’ve been here for three years. Is there anything I need to know before working here? What’s it like? W-what do the interns exactly do?” 

Jonathan had a knowing look in his eyes, but answered his questions much to Gavin’s relief. 

“Yeah man. The first couple of months they make you do all this boring tasks like filing shit away until they deem you responsible enough to be in a lab. It sucks at first, but it’s worth it when you get to work in the lab. Usually the interns are there to clean the equipment and organize the data, but sometimes you get to partake in the experiments and even design a couple yourself. Just suffer through the first months you’re here, and you’ll be fine.” Jonathan paused and bit his lip. His eyebrows were furrowed, and his knuckles were hovering around his lips. Gavin frowned and gently nudged his shoulder.

“What is it? You okay?” Jonathan snapped out of his stupor and looked directly into his eyes. Gavin, caught off guard, stammered and awkwardly looked away. The older man grabbed his shoulders, forcing Gavin to look into his eyes. He tried to squirm out of his grip, but to no avail.

“Listen man,” Jonathan whispered. He scanned the room wildly before he continued his gaze at Gavin. “You seem like a nice guy, and I would hate for nasty shit to happen to you. It ain’t what it looks like here. I haven’t been able to gather much information because they keep security real tight, but from what I’ve seen, it’s something darker… something far more sinister. I witnessed interns who don’t obey the rules or stick their nose where it doesn’t belong disappear. They’re there one day, and the next they’re not. I’ve survived this long by keeping my head down. I advise that you do the same.”

Gavin scoffed. “If it’s so dangerous, then why are you still working here? C’mon, it can’t be that bad.”

“They pay the interns well here so that they don’t try to leave. I’m here because my family desperately needs the money. My father can’t afford to pay for his cancer treatments, man. I tried to apply for a couple of jobs around the neighborhood, but no one would hire me. Some important-looking guy found me outside of a restaurant. He offered a job to me, and I said yes. I don’t have anywhere else to go. Just… be careful around here, aye?” Gavin sighed, but nodded. Jonathan released his grip and leaned back in relief. 

After Jonathan left, Gavin lay on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. Jonathan’s words kept echoing in his head. Sinister activities… within HYDRA Industries? The company was well-known and reputable. There was no way that it could be dangerous… but then again, he wasn’t interviewed in a stereotypical office room, and he was interviewed by a lieutenant rather than the head researcher. But his biology professor was the one who told him about the internship, so it can’t be that bad… right? Gavin wiped his face in frustration. It just doesn’t make any sense! For now, he would have to listen to Jonathan’s advice. He wouldn’t want to stir any trouble on his first day of work. Thoughts racing through his mind, Gavin closed his eyes, waiting for sleep to take over.

* * *

Gavin woke up to the sound of his alarm blaring. He sleepily got up and turned it off, then made his way over to the bathroom. After a hot shower, he put on a black button-up and a pair of black slacks. He slipped his feet into a pair of white shoes and donned a lab coat. He locked the door to his apartment and made his way over to Lab 61B where he would be meeting with head researcher Dr. Seward.

Doctor Elias Seward was a frail-looking man with round glasses and a receding hairline. He had poor posture and a look of constant exasperation on his face. When Gavin met him, the doctor gave him a tight smile and firmly shook his hand. Dr. Seward gave him an extensive tour of the facility, mentioning the areas where the interns have or do not have access to. After several hours, Dr. Seward gave a tired Gavin his first task: organize the files in Corridor C. 

Suppressing a groan, Gavin made his way to the file cabinets in the first office room in the corridor. He plopped down in front of the one closest to the door and began pulling out the files in the lowest shelf. Several grueling hours later, as he was making his way through a particularly messy file cabinet, he stumbled across a file that piqued his interest.

 _The Winter Soldier_ , the file read. Gavin quickly looked around to make sure no one was watching. When the coast was clear, he glanced back down at the file in his hand and opened it up. It contained a picture of a frozen man and several mission reports.

As he began to read, he discovered that apparently the frozen man was called the Winter Soldier, and he was a deadly assassin credited for over a dozen assassinations, including the deaths of Howard and Maria Stark. He was trained in multiple martial art forms and weaponry and was at the peak of physical perfection. He was brutal, ruthless, and showed no remorse. He was kept in cryogenic stasis until he was needed for another mission. He worked for the government under the command of a man called Secretary Alexander Pierce, and with the recent collaboration with HYDRA Industries, he was to serve HYDRA Industries as well. The most recent mission report stated that he was to be stationed at the same building Gavin was interning at. For what reason, Gavin didn’t know. 

He sighed as he closed the file. He shakily pushed his glasses up and ran a hand through his hair. Judging from what the file contained, the Winter Soldier was like a bomb waiting to go off. The perfect assassin ready to kill anyone at a moment’s notice. Gavin felt he wouldn’t be as terrified if the Winter Soldier was working somewhere else. Out of all the buildings in the world, he had to be stationed at the same building Gavin was in. Gavin fiddled with his gloves. Guess he would have to try to avoid the man as much as possible. It would be a bad idea to be in the same room as this guy.

But Gavin had a niggling feeling at the back of his head that the file didn’t really hold all the information about the Winter Soldier. A large chunk of his story seemed to be missing, almost on purpose it seems. Gavin was curious to know more about the Winter Soldier. Who was he? Why did he sign up for this? Did he even volunteer in the first place? Did he know he was going to be put in a cryogenic stasis? How did he come to work for Alexander Pierce? So many questions were left unanswered that it left him feeling empty, incomplete like the Winter Soldier’s story.

Gavin shook his head. He wasn’t hired to snoop around; he was here to intern and get his science credits. Once he did so, he would take off. Leave this mysterious man behind and continue with with life. 

But his curiosity kept tugging at this mind. He had to know the story behind the assassin. It’s like he couldn’t move on until he knew everything about the Winter Soldier. For now, he’ll just have to continue working. There’s not much he could do now.

Gavin continued to organize the files in corridor. It was easy work, but it was super boring. He’d much prefer to work in a lab. By the time he was done, it was lunchtime. He quickly made his way to the cafeteria. After picking out a simple ham and cheese sandwich and a bottle of water, he saw Jonathan waving at him from a lonely table in the corner. As Gavin sat down, Jonathan began to speak.

“So, how your first day? Any problems you ran into…?” Gavin smiled.

“Eh, it was okay. I organized some files. No problems so far, but pretty much boring. You?” Jonathan sipped his coffee.

“I cleaned some beakers and analyzed some data. It was a slow day.” The conversation fell as the two silently ate their lunch. When Gavin finished his sandwich, he debated whether or not to ask Jonathan about the Winter Soldier. He decided that it couldn’t hurt to ask. 

“Hey Jonathan, what do you know about the Winter Soldier?” Jonathan raised an eyebrow, but answered the question anyways.

“All I heard is that he is an incredible fighter, ruthless, and prone to violence. He can definitely kick your ass. I’ve seen him walking around the halls, and it always freaks me out. Best to steer clear of him. Why do you ask?” Gavin shrugged, looking away.

“Oh, nothing really. I was just curious.” Jonathan nodded his head. The two fell into a comfortable silence.

* * *

Gavin spent the first two months filing reports, organizing files, and occasionally getting coffee for the scientists. Sometimes he was asked to clean up a lab or two. He tried to sneak a look at the work of the scientists, but with no luck. One day after cleaning up Lab 71A, Dr. Seward grabbed him and pulled him aside. Gavin blinked in confusion.

“Hello Dr. Seward, how can I help you?” Dr. Seward narrowed his eyes. _Uh oh_ , thought Gavin. _Am I in trouble?_

“Your file says that your mother is a beautician, right?” Dr. Seward asked. 

“Yeah, why? What is up with everyone asking me if my mother is a beautician? If you’re gonna ask if I help my mother out like Lieutenant Vasiliev then yeah, I do.” Dr. Seward thought for a minute before he sighed. He looked at Gavin with a weird mixture of relief and pity.

“Great. I have a task for you.” Gavin raised an eyebrow.

“Okay… is it to organize more files?” Dr. Seward shook his head. What he said next made filled Gavin to the brim with fear.

“Your next task is to wax the Winter Soldier.”


	3. Shave and a Waxing, Sol-dier!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Winter Soldier and the Intern finally meet! What shall happen?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Geddit? Shave and haircut, shave and a waxing? No? Sorry, awful pun. Couldn't resist. I was struggling a bit with this chapter, so please let me know if I made any grammatical/other errors. Also, sorry about the Russian. I used Google Translate for it. Any Russian speakers, please let me know of any mistakes. 
> 
> Thank you for reading, and have a nice day!

Gavin stood outside the door, desperately wishing he was filing reports instead. It took everything in him to stop himself from running away. One of the guards standing next to the door was looking at him with concern. He honestly couldn’t blame him; he was pretty terrified himself. When Dr. Seward told him that he was going to wax _the Winter Soldier_ , he could only stare at him in disbelief. 

“Y-you’re kidding? Is this some practical joke? Did Jonathan set you up with this? I bet he did. Haha very funny, guys. Ya got me.” Dr. Seward shook his head.

“No, son. I’m serious. The higher ups want you to wax the Soldier. They say it offers better mobility and his chest hairs have been getting caught in his uniform or whatever.”

It took awhile for him to register what Dr. Seward was saying. When it finally hit him, he started hyperventilating, and it took a good 15 minutes before Gavin calmed down.

“Couldn’t you get an actual beautician to wax him? Why me?” Gavin asked, running his hand through his hair. He focused on getting his breathing under control. Deep breath in, count to 5, let it out. Deep breath in, count to 5, let it out. 

“Eh, to be honest, the higher-ups were too lazy to hire one. Something about confidentiality and saving money. When they saw that your mother was one, they were overjoyed. It was even better when they discovered that you had experience. They don’t want to waste money on something so frivolous when they have an intern practically doing it for free. Sorry, my boy. It looks like you have to do the dirty work.” Dr. Seward put a pitying hand on Gavin’s shoulder.

Of course they were too lazy to hire an actual one. Stupid corporate heads and their stinginess! Because of them, he was going to wax the chest of one of the most feared assassins in history. Could life get any more cruel?

Gavin shook his head and slapped his cheeks. _C’mon Gav_ , he mentally chided. _All you have to do is wax his chest and leave. No more, no less. It’ll be over before you know it._

Dr. Seward told him that the Winter Soldier knew about his arrival and promised him that the Winter Soldier would not harm him at all. Gavin highly doubted that. For all he knew, the assassin was in there waiting to kill him. 

_Oh God, I’m gonna die before I’m thirty! I won’t be able to graduate college, get married, adopt twenty kids, move to Greece, and grow old with my husband! I am so dead. So dead. The gods have decided to abandoned me. Today marks the death day of Gavin Willoughby, age 22 years old. Goodbye everyone, it was nice knowing you._ Gavin had to resist the urge to slam his head on the door. He nodded to the guards standing next to the door. With a horribly shaking hand, he gently opened the door.

The Winter Soldier was _most definitely not frozen_ and was a lot more terrifying in person. He had shoulder length brown hair and piercing blue eyes. Gavin honestly felt like he was being stabbed the chest with multiple swords with the way he was glaring at him. He was muscular and had a metal arm with a red star in place of his left arm. The only thing he was wearing was a pair of black pants. 

For a man who could possibly kill him without blinking an eye, he sure was one good-looking guy. Gavin wasn’t sure he should be terrified or turned on.

They stared at each other in an awkward silence. After what seemed like an eternity, Gavin looked away, face bright red and heart pounding in his chest.

 _Just get it over with, Gav_ , he thought. _Just do it!_

Gavin stepped forward but then stopped. He started internally panicking. Darn! He forgot about his gloves. When he worked at his mother’s salon, he didn’t wear any gloves. The clients were usually regulars who knew about his condition. They were really accepting, and he didn’t have to worry about being judged. So what should he do now? Take off the gloves and risk getting outed to his superiors? Or keep them on and suffer silently?

The Winter Soldier narrowed his eyes suspiciously. He was taking too much time! Quickly debating in his head, Gavin figured it was only that one time. Suffering silently was something he was good at anyways. 

He took a deep breath and walked toward the assassin, a smile plastered on his face. Well, at least he hoped it came out a smile. Probably more of a pained grimace, to be honest.

“H-hello, my name is Gabe-- uh, I mean Gad! Gav-Gavin. Yeah, Gavin. Gavin is, uh, my name. Gavin’s my name. I guess I’ll, um, be waxing your chest today. Heh.” Gavin felt himself shrivel up inside. _Wow, Gav, way to make a first impression._ The Soldier kept staring at him, eyes still narrowed. 

“So, uh, l-let’s get started. Can you please, um, lie down?” The Soldier kept staring. “Uh, please lie down. I can’t wax your chest with you sitting up.”

The Soldier, emotionless, blinked and nodded. He swung his legs up and lay on the table. His eyes, thankfully, moved from one scared-out-of-his-wits Gavin to the ceiling. The intern assumed that the assassin didn’t have a chemical peel or use products containing Retin-A. Actually, he probably didn’t use skincare at all. _Darn_ , Gavin thought. _Wish I can have his smooth skin. Wait a minute, this isn't the time to be distracted! Focus, Gav, focus!_

Gavin gulped and fixed his gloves. After running a hand through his hair, he scrambled over to the little table beside the Soldier that contained the materials he needed. Luckily, the wax was already hot. After wiping his chest with an alcohol towelette, Gavin picked up a wooden spatula and dipped it into the wax. Twirling it so the wax doesn’t drip, he took the spatula and began spreading the wax over the hairiest part of the Soldier’s chest.

“I have to warn you that it is going to hurt a bit. I’m sorry.” The Soldier looked at him and nodded. After placing a paper strip on the wax and waiting a couple of seconds, Gavin quickly ripped it off. The assassin grunted, but otherwise made no reaction. Gavin placed a hand on the place he just waxed. The man on the table looked at him in confusion.

“It’s to soothe the area so that it doesn’t hurt as much,” Gavin said. “Let me know if it’s too painful for you, okay?” He continued waxing the man. Sometimes his hands shook, but most of the time he was precise and careful. The man stared at him, almost as if he was searching for an answer to an impossible question. It only made Gavin more nervous.

It was becoming difficult to wax the Soldier’s chest with gloves. He didn’t have much dexterity, and sometimes wax dripped onto his gloves. Gavin tried to stay patient, but it was frustrating not to have to same mobility as he did with his usual clients. Finally, after spilling a huge drop of wax onto his gloves, he finally had enough.

“ _Zabud’ ob etom!_ ” He ripped off the gloves and set them on the table. He felt a rush of satisfaction flow through him. The Soldier could only stare, dumbfounded. While his right hand looked fine, his left was a completely different story.

His left hand was entirely skeletal. It was just pure white bone, no muscle or skin at all. From the carpals, bone transitioned to brown, leathery skin. It faded into normal skin at the end of his wrist. He used to have a normal hand, but when he was sixteen, the skin started peeling off. He and his mother went to all kinds of doctors, but none of them could explain the phenomenon going on. He watched in despair as skin and muscle slowly fell off. He was delighted to find out he could still use it. Unfortunately, it led to the kids at his school making fun of him. In response, he took to wearing gloves and transferred to a different school. Besides his mother, friends, and clients, he never bothered to take them off. Until today.

Gavin suddenly felt a cold rush of fear and insecurity flood his body. He avoided looking at the Soldier and immersed himself in his task. As more and more hair was removed from his chest, he found himself sweating and felt his clothes constrict him. Was the room always this warm?

Oh, he forgot the man in front of him was one gorgeous man. Underneath all that hair was glorious pecs and a perfect six-pack. Gavin tried his best not to drool.

 _Oh my god, he’s too hot_ , thought Gavin. _I can’t handle it._

Desperate to calm himself, he started singing a lullaby. It was the one his grandmother sang to him when he was a child.

“Spi mladenets, moy prekrasný. Bayushki bayu,” he softly sang. “Tikho smotrit myesyats yasný f kolýbyel tvayu.” The Soldier whipped his head to stare directly into Gavin’s eyes. Gavin squeaked and looked away. He kept singing. It soothed him enough to make waxing easier for him. The Soldier didn’t stop staring at him. 

When he finally finished, he disposed all the used strips and wooden spatulas. He then turned and faced the Soldier, eyes darting away. 

“Um, I’m done, sir. Usually, I put a soothing gel after waxing so it stings less, but there doesn’t seem to be any. I’m sorry,” he said. “You are free to go. Have a nice day!” 

He hightailed it out of there, never bothering to see the Soldier’s reaction. Jesus, that was probably the most uncomfortable moment of his life! Thankfully, he was never required to strike up a conversation during the process. That would have been awkward. He already done enough damage to himself during his little introduction. He also hoped the Soldier would be kind enough not to tell his boss about his skele-hand. Who knows what would happen if they were to know. Until then, he would just have to trust the man not to snitch on him. Gavin sighed a breath of relief. Thank god that was over.

Hopefully, he would never have to see him ever again.

* * *

“What!? They want me _shave his beard_? Wasn’t waxing him torture enough?” It had been a week since his painful encounter with the Winter Soldier. Jonathan pestered him about it, but he only shrugged and said, “I waxed him, alright.” He was pushing the memory as far away as possible. Every time his mind recalled the image of the Soldier’s chest, he flushed scarlet and mumble to himself. He was hoping that was the last time he would encounter the assassin. Looks like he was going to eat his words faster than he thought. 

“Unfortunately yes. I know that task wasn’t pleasant for you, but the superiors were dead set on you grooming him. Cheapskates.” Gavin gave a tiny smile at that statement. At least the doctor was sympathetic to his plight. Gavin huffed in frustration.

“Oh, well do they want me to trim his hair while I’m at it?” Dr. Seward didn’t seem to catch onto his sarcasm.

“No, they only asked you to get rid of the beard. Don’t know why though. The hair is getting a bit long in my opinion. Anyways, good luck!” Gavin groaned and hit his head against the wall. He leaned back and ran a shaky hand through hair hair. Fate really enjoyed messing with him, huh? 

Gavin made his way back to the room where he originally waxed the Soldier. He nodded at the guards, one of whom opened the door for him. He swore one of them called him a poor bastard. The assassin was sitting at the same spot he was a week ago. Instead of waxing materials, a straight edge razor, a towel, a bottle of shaving cream, and a pasted strop. He made his way over to him, a polite smile on his face. He was still nervous to approach the assassin, but was considerably less than his first encounter. It didn’t stop him from tripping over his words though.

“Hello, i-i-it’s me again. It’s ni-nice to see yo-you again. I-I guess I’ll be shaving y-your beard, huh? Well, let’s get to it!” He figured since he wasn’t yelled at or dragged away to be experimented on that it was safe to say that the Winter Soldier hadn’t snitched on him. He could this time though, a small voice in the back of his head said. Still, it would be a lot easier to shave him without the gloves. With hesitation, he took off his gloves and put them aside. It didn’t mean he wouldn’t be self-conscious.

He flicked open the razor. The blade seemed sharp enough, so he wouldn’t need to use the strop at all. He put it down and reached for the shaving cream. After placing a small dollop of shaving cream in his hand, he lathered it up in his hands and began to apply it to the assassin’s face. The man tensed at the feeling of Gavin’s hands, but eventually relaxed. After applying the cream, Gavin wiped his hands and picked up the razor, holding it by its shank.

Using his left hand to pull the skin back, the intern put the razor on the Soldier’s skin, using quick, small strokes to remove the hair. After he removed a considerable amount of hair, he wiped it on the towel. This routine continued, Gavin shaving the Soldier and wiping the blade clean. The assassin stared at him the entirely time, rarely blinking. It freaked Gavin out, but he tried his best not to look scared and focused on his task. When he finished he gently wiped the Winter Soldier’s face, put on a shy smile, and said goodbye. Maybe because he groomed the Winter Soldier, he wouldn’t have to do it again.

He really should stop making these kinds of assumptions.

* * *

“Hey Gav, Boss wants you to head over to the Winter Soldier. From what I’ve heard, he came back from a mission pretty beat up. He wants you to check his vitals.” Gavin sighs, exasperated.

“Why are they always asking me to do these things? I didn’t apply for this internship to remove hair from an assassin! Besides, shouldn’t the doctors at the med bay be doing these kinds of things?”

“Apparently an experiment went wrong and led to this huge explosion inside Lab 21C. Since the medbay is close to Lab 21C, it was affected in the explosion. A couple of doctors and nurses suffered severe injuries, so they were taken to a local hospital. The Winter Soldier’s injuries aren’t severe enough for him to be sent there. All you need to do is check the vitals, and the remaining doctors can take over from there. That’s all you have to do. He’s in Room 5C, for your information.” Jonathan gave him a knowing look, then left. Gavin was starting to really regret applying for the internship. Was it really worth the money? Well, at least the Soldier was attractive. If you ignore the fact that he’s a deadly assassin who could end you life in a single blow. 

Gavin made his way over to the medbay. He winced, taking note of the scorched ceiling and blackened walls. One of the walls was completely obliterated, making it easy for Gavin to spot the Winter Soldier. He was sitting on the bed farthest away from the opening, his back facing Gavin. 

_That’s odd_ , thought Gavin. _Where are the guards?_

He was sure the assassin could hear him approaching when he swiveled his body to face Gavin. He was shirtless with only his pants and combat boots on. He had a split lip, and his right shoulder was dislocated. He sustained several cuts and bruises on his face as well as different parts of his chest. His knuckles were busted, and blood was seeping out of a cut on his upper arm. Gavin hurried over to the Soldier.

“Hello Mr. Soldier, we meet again. This time I’ll be checking your vitals. It’ll be over before you know it. Tell me if you are in any serious pain, okay?” He smiled at the assassin. Gavin checked his pulse, fingers pressed again his throat. He moved on to check his blood pressure, body temperature, and respiration rate. Just like last time, the Soldier kept staring at him. Gavin really wished he would cut that out. He took a step back after checking and looked around. Jonathan said that the remaining doctors would arrive, but so far there were none. He looked back at the Winter Soldier. Gavin desperately wanted to leave, but the Soldier was pretty beat up. Gavin couldn’t let him deal with his injuries alone. It wouldn’t be right to do that. He sighed. He was going to get himself killed one day. 

He started looking around for medical supplies. The Soldier stared at him questioningly. “Stay put. I’m looking for the first aid kit. Actually any medical supplies, really.”

“If you’re looking for them, they’re over there by the door.”

Gavin’s head shot up, eyes widened in surprise. That was the first time the Soldier talked to him! His voice was rough and husky, most likely from disuse. Said assassin stared at him curiously. 

“Thanks.” He pulled it out from the shelf. He carried it over and placed it on the bed the Soldier was sitting on. He opened the kit and started rummaging it through it.

“What are you doing?” Gavin nervously chuckled.

“Patching you up. I don’t see anyone else doing it. Those cuts can become infected if they’re not treated quickly. Now please hold still.” He took out the antiseptic and a piece of cloth. “This is going to sting, just to let you know.” The Soldier grabbed his wrist. Gavin reeled back, but he held on.

“Why are you doing this? You were only ordered to check my vitals.” Gavin rolled his eyes.

“Because I want to, that’s why. I don’t see any doctors around, and I don’t feel comfortable leaving you to deal with your injuries yourself. Now stop talking and let me help.” The Soldier was still, but let go. Gavin proceeded to clean his wounds.

The Soldier hissed as the antiseptic met with the cuts, but did not resist. Gavin continued cleaning the cuts, making sure any open lacerations were disinfected. He took out some ointment and applied them to the cuts carefully. There wasn’t much he could do about the one on his upper arm, so he took a couple of bandages and made a tourniquet. After bandaging the rest, he took a look at his shoulder and winced.

“It looks like I’ll have to push it back in. You ready?” The Soldier nodded back with a grim look on his face. Gavin nodded back and quickly popped it back into place. The assassin grunted in pain. He straightened his back and tested out his arm. He looked back up and into Gavin’s eyes. Gavin stuttered and ran a hand through his hair.

“Uh, I guess that’s pretty much it. Take it easy for a couple of days, and drink plenty of water, I guess? I’m not a doctor, so I don’t know. Alright, see ya!” He turned around to leave, but a hand on his wrist stopped. Gavin turned back, confused. The Soldier awkwardly looked away, a light pink dusting his cheeks.

“Thanks,” he mumbled. Gavin smiled.

“No problem. I’ll see you around. Bye!” Gavin felt his face turn red as he walked away. Once he was out of the Soldier’s sight, he leaned against the wall and sighed. He fanned himself.

“He’s going to be the death of me. I know it for sure.”

* * *

“Hahaha, oh my god, this is hilarious! Do you think they’re going to get together?”

“That scrawny intern with the gloves and the Asset? Honestly, I can see it. They’re kind of cute together.”

“Yo, but what about that kid’s hand? That’s pretty fucked up. Should we report it?”

“Nah, this is the first real exciting thing to happen here. It gets so boring watching the cams everyday.”

“Ugh, tell me about it.”

* * *

“Hey, the Winter Soldier came from his mission. Boss man wants you to be there because he seems agitated. He thinks because he has been in the same room as you multiple times that you have some sort of calming effect or whatnot.” Gavin put his book down and stood up. 

“Well, as long as I’m still being paid. Oh, and getting my science credits. Those are important too. Well, lead the way, Jon." Jonathan nodded, and the two made their way down the hall. As they were walking, a sense of dread filled the pit of the stomach.

He’s… agitated? Gavin wasn’t so sure how to react. The Soldier was always calm and emotionless during their meetings, and recently he was comfortable enough to speak. But this time he’s agitated and more prone to violence…? A trickle of fear crawled down his spine. He fiddled with this gloves and bit his lip. Jonathan looked back at him.

"Oh yeah, Gav, there was one more thing I forgot to tell you. Don't speak when Secretary Pierce gets here. A lot of interns disappeared because of him." Gavin froze.

Secretary Pierce?

As in... Secretary Alexander Pierce?


	4. Removing the Veil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gavin discovers the truth about HYDRA. He is _not_ a happy camper.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhhhh sorry this took so long. The first draft of this chapter really unsatisfied me, so I had to write it all over again! Terribly sorry! Next chapter will be on time, I promise.
> 
> I deleted it last chapter, but I mentioned that I would update every Saturday, but last week was a fluke. This time I'll post on time!
> 
> Please note that there is Universe Alterations in this story. In this chapter, the bank vault scene does not actually happen inside the bank vault, and Project Insight begins a few days after the bank vault scene. That's all.
> 
> I am sorry for the delay, and I hope you enjoy reading it! Have a nice day!
> 
> -Sloth
> 
> UPDATE: Minor word changes.

Gavin’s mind reeled as he and Jonathan approached the room where the Winter Soldier was held. He was confused. He knew that the Soldier worked under Pierce in the government, but usually lower level officers and handlers took orders from him and dealt with the Soldier themselves. So what could make a man with an immense amount of power come down to the lab to confront the Soldier himself? 

Gavin shook himself out of his reverie. He would have to figure that out later. Right now, his task was to stand near the Soldier to calm him down. Whispered instructions from Jonathan had him walk toward the Soldier and stand next to him, opposite of the scientist working on his mechanical arm. To his surprise, the ever vigilant Soldier didn’t bat an eyelash at him. Instead, he seemed to be lost in his own thoughts. Gavin had to resist the urge to put a comforting hand on him. He just looked so lost and confused. 

Suddenly, the Soldier sat up and flinged the scientist backwards, his body sent flying. The guards in the room immediately pointed their guns at the assassin as another scientist ran to help the injured man up. Gavin flinched, and the Soldier finally acknowledged his presence. His eyes were wide, still full of confusion. He looked like a spooked rabbit ready to bolt. Gavin gave him a small, reassuring smile, relaxing him slightly. 

“It’s alright,” he whispered, loud enough only for the Soldier to hear. “You’re okay. Everything’s alright. Don’t worry.” The Soldier gave him a tiny nod. His darkness in his eyes held a soft twinkle of light, making Gavin’s heart flutter a little. Gavin’s smile grew wider.

Gavin and the Soldier stared at each other, waiting for the other to make a move. It was broken when voices were heard in the corridor. Gavin looked up, startled. Jonathan walked up to him and gently guided him away. The Soldier held his gaze, but eventually turned and looked forward as the voices came nearer, face emotionless once again.

“It’s best not to get involved. Secretary Pierce has a lot of power. It wouldn’t be a good idea to anger him,” said Jonathan. He kept a reassuring hand on Gavin’s shoulder as Secretary Pierce entered the room.

The man was tall and had brown hair. He was middle age and had a look of indifference on his face. He took off his glasses and looked at the Soldier. Something about him made Gavin anxious, making him bite his lip as he watched the interaction. 

“Mission report,” he said. The Soldier stayed still, eyes blank. “Mission report now.” No response. He bent down to the Soldier’s eye level and backhanded him hard. Gavin yelped in horror. He took a step forward, but Jonathan held him back. Worried, Jonathan gave him a reassuring squeeze. 

“The man on the bridge,” the Soldier said, brow furrowed and eyes blinking. “Who was he?”

“You met him earlier this week on another assignment.” The Soldier frowned. 

“I knew him.” _He knew the man on the bridge?_

“Your work has been a gift to mankind,” said Pierce. “You shaped the century. And I need you to do it one more time. Society’s at a tipping point between order and chaos. And tomorrow morning, we’re gonna give it a push. But if you don’t do your part, I can’t do mine. And HYDRA can’t give the world the freedom it deserves.” The scientists looked at each other, unsure of what to say next. Then one of them hesitantly stepped forward.

“Uh, sir, we do not think the project should be launched tomorrow.” Pierce turned around and stared at the man, face blank but eyes glinting dangerously. The scientist gulped.

“Recent activity shows that an outsider interfered and damaged the coding in the Helicarriers. The damage is extensive, I believe it can be done within five days.” Pierce stared at the man longer as he nervously shifted his weight. After a pause, Pierce finally responded.

“I want your team to work on it as fast as possible. If it isn’t completed within five days, you’re dead. Understood?” The scientist hastily nodded and stepped back. Pierce turned back to the Soldier, who was still looking pensive and so, so lost.

“But I knew him.” Gavin’s mind was reeling from watching the interaction. Jonathan was right. Something was deeply wrong with HYDRA, and he was right in the midst of it. Gavin felt a chill go down his spine when he heard the following words:

“Then wipe him, and start over.”

His heart dropped when he saw the scientists push down the Soldier. The machine closed in on him, and Gavin flinched and looked away when the Soldier starting screaming. Jonathan looked at him, worry filling his gaze. Gavin tried not to cry as he watched the man in front of him be tortured. 

When it was finally over, Gavin felt hollow, unable to comprehend the situation in front of him. They, HYDRA Industries, just brutally tortured and memory wiped a man. A human with emotions and memories. A person who once had friends and family whom he laughed and cried and screamed with. And they tortured him without batting an eye. Gavin clenched his fists in fury. How dare they! How dare they do that him. There must be something he could do… 

The Soldier stood up, memory wipe completed and arm fixed. He glanced around the room, face observant and emotionless. He walked out the room escorted by several guards. As Jonathan gently tugged him back to their apartments, Gavin realized something.

The Soldier didn’t recognize him at all.

* * *

Gavin laid on his bed, a dark cloud hovering over him. He knew there was something wrong with HYDRA, but he didn’t want to believe it. It was only until that ghastly memory wipe did he finally see through HYDRA’s mask. 

Why couldn’t he see through it? The way they treated him like a rabid animal, dangerous and always on a leash. Guards who, in an instant, can kill him if he makes one wrong move. They put in him cryo freeze, preserving him until he was needed, and when they were done, they wiped and froze him again, an object of destruction rather than a living, breathing human. They tortured him until he lost his memories and the ability to feel remorse or sorrow. Gavin couldn’t even fathom how bad the Soldier’s mental state was from years and years of torture and murder.

Gavin felt a couple of tears leak from his eyes. He hastily brushed them away. He couldn’t help but feel like a useless piece of garbage. There wasn’t anything he could do to help the Soldier. He was just plain, average Gavin. Nothing special at all. 

Suddenly, his phone buzzed. Gavin groaned and sat up. He reached for his phone and hissed when the bright light hit his face. When his eyes finally adjusted, he stared at the screen, mouth agape.

_Meet me tomorrow at the Roman Café, 8 sharp. I have some news for you- Taylor_

* * *

Gavin, the next morning, asked Dr. Seward if he could have the day off. Sympathetic, he agreed and put a hand on Gavin’s shoulder.

“It’s not easy seeing something like that happen. I would like to say that it gets easier, or you get used to it, but that’s not true. It’s a pretty traumatic experience. Just take some time for yourself, alright? If you need anything, ask me or Jonathan.” Gavin gave him a sad smile.

“Thank you Dr. Seward. Talk to you later.” Dr. Seward squeezed his shoulder and then left. 

Gavin left the building around 7:30. It took him 15 minutes to get to the café. While waiting for Taylor, he ordered a cup of breakfast tea and a chocolate croissant. He finished his breakfast 5 minutes before Taylor showed up. He wiped his mouth with a napkin then stood up to give Taylor a hug.

“Hey Taylor, how’s it going?” Taylor, with her short purple hair, grinned at him.

“Oh my gosh, it seems like forever since I last saw you! I’m doing well, how about you? Have you been eating well? Drinking enough water? Getting enough sleep?” She looked around before she leaned closer and whispered, “Are you okay, though? I hacked the cameras and saw what happened. That’s not easy to digest.” Gavin sighed.

“It’s difficult for me to wrap my head around, but I’m trying my best. Now, what is it that you want to tell me?” Taylor put a finger on her lips, then motioned Gavin to follow her.

“Not here. It’s not safe here. Come, I know a place where we can talk without interference.” She grabbed his hand and walked out of the café with Gavin in tow. They walked down several blocks and twisted alleyways before they came upon a run-down apartment building. They approached the back entrance, Taylor producing a key seemingly out of nowhere. She wiggled her eyebrows at Gavin, who snorted and let out a snicker. She unlocked the door and motioned for Gavin to walk in.

“Ladies first,” she said with a smirk. Gavin rolled his eyes but went inside anyways. He walked up the stairs and was guided by Taylor to a room on his left. She pushed past him and opened the door.

To his surprise, the inside was a lot more nicer with plush chairs, a coffee table, a sofa, and big green curtains that were on either side of a big window. The window gave a view of the street down below. Taylor, after closing the door, quickly rushed to the window and pulled the curtains shut. She did her routine check to make sure there were no wallhats or secret cameras before finally sitting down on the sofa next to Gavin. She reached underneath the sofa to pull out her bag which held her trusty laptop. She opened it up and typed for a minute before opening up a folder. She turned to Gavin with wide eyes.

“So you know when I was hesitant about you joining HYDRA Industries?” Gavin nodded. “Well, I decided to do some research on them and found a whole crap ton of stuff. Turns out, they’re an illegal terrorist organization hell bent on world domination. They used to work for the German government before becoming independent. They have people all over the world, planted within governments and other places. They’re really dangerous. Captain America crashed into the ocean because he was fighting HYDRA.” Gavin took a sharp intake of breath. Taylor looked at him in concern.

“Gavin, where did you learn about the internship? Who told you?” Gavin ran a hand through his hair. 

“My biology professor, Professor Hoffmann. He told me there was an internship available for me, and that he was willing to write a recommendation for me. Why?”

“Gavin, he used to work for HYDRA as a researcher. He helped them create the Winter Soldier.” Gavin felt his stomach drop. His professor, a member of HYDRA? A terrorist? He looked away, fiddling with his gloves.

“H-how did he get involved? What do you mean he helped create the Winter Soldier?”

“He helped this guy named Arnim Zola develop a version of the super soldier serum Captain America was injected with. He also created the memory wipe machine you saw yesterday.” Gavin paled, hands shaking furiously. He felt tears build up in the corners of his eyes. 

“”H-h-he tortured the Soldier? Why?” Taylor shook her head morosely.

“I don’t know. But what I do know is that HYDRA is full of crazies, and you need to get out of there ASAP.” Gavin threw up his hands.

“I can’t just leave now! What if they get suspicious and try to kill me for something? It’s too risky. Maybe later, but definitely not now.” He ran a hand through his hair and let out a shaky sigh. He turned to Taylor after a brief moment of silence.

“Why did he want me to work for HYDRA? Out of all people, why me?”

“I guess HYDRA needed an intern that was quiet and wouldn’t talk back. The professor was planted at our university to scout for potential interns and workers. He had his eye on you for awhile.” Gavin felt bile rise up in his throat. “He probably thought you were the best candidate which was obviously the wrong idea. You’re way too clever for them. HYDRA did the rest by putting up the website and lying about the other applicants. But otherwise else, I don’t know.” Gavin remembered his meeting with Lieutenant Vasiliev and Dr. Seward. He smacked his forehead and groaned.

“Oh yeah, I forgot about my mom. Apparently they needed someone to wax the Winter Soldier, but they were too cheap to get one so they hired me. And I needed the credits desperately, so it worked out in the end. That’s probably why.” Taylor snorted and let out a laugh.

“Wait wait wait, _you waxed the Winter Soldier_? Boy, what in the--” Gavin waved his arms around, a bright blush spreading on his face.

“T-that’s not important right now! I-I..uh… what information do you have on the Winter Soldier? What’s his name? When was he born? Who were his parents?” Taylor had a knowing smirk on her face, but answered his question anyways. 

“Easy, tiger. I got the information. Gimme a second to find the files.” She quickly tapped the keys on her laptop, eyes scanning quickly. She let out a noise of triumph when she found the correct files.

“James Buchanan ‘Bucky’ Barnes, Sergeant of 107th Infantry Regiment. Born March 10, 1917, he grew up in Brooklyn with his best friend Steven Rogers, better known as Captain America. He was also a member of the Howling Commandos, Captain America’s team during World War Two. He died falling off a train, but a Soviet soldier found him and turned him over to HYDRA. Under Zola’s instruction, they removed what was left of his left arm and replaced it with a bionic one. He was then given the super soldier serum and trained to become the Winter Soldier. They tortured him until his mind was completely wiped of memories. They also did this to make sure he was remorseless when killing. After every mission, his mind was wiped and he was put into cryogenic freeze to preserve him for future missions. It also says that his Soldier training is trigger by a couple of words from some book. His handler usually says them.” Gavin looked at her quizzically.

“Who’s his handler?”

“Some Russian guy named Vasily Karpov.”

“Right.” Gavin looked down at his hands. Taylor looked at him, worried.

“You okay, Gav? How’re you feeling?” Gavin sighed and put his head in his hands.

“I’m so angry at them and myself. I’m angry for all the horrible things they’ve done to the Sol-, no, Bucky. They torture him just so he could be their perfect little puppet! And who knows what else they’ve done to other people! Hell, I’m angry at _myself_ for not realizing how twisted they were from the beginning. I never should have accepted the internship in the first place.” Taylor put a comforting hand on his arm.

“Hey, it’s not your fault for what happened to him. They’re bad guys who have no conception of morality and ethics. They're cruel, cold, and absolutely heartless. Don’t blame yourself on what happened. The past is the past, and we can only look toward the future. We live in the present to change the future.” Gavin nodded and looked at the ground. He then looked a Taylor with a look of determination on his face.

“What can I do to get back at HYDRA? I want to destroy for what they have done. They don’t deserve to exist after all the terror and pain they’ve caused. They killed innocent people because they stood in the way of their plans. I want to do whatever it takes to make sure they never to do the same to another person ever again.” Taylor reached into her bag and takes out a USB. She handed it to Gavin, who clutched in confusion.

“Why are you giving me this?”

“It’s so you can download all their top secret files, dummy. If we can steal their files and give them to the government or expose them online, there’ll be a better chance of authority figures taking action. Some files may contain locations of other HYDRA hideouts or secret plans that SHIELD, the CIA, or whatever can put a stop to.”

“This is really dangerous. I don’t think I can do it.”

“Oh come on! You’re Gavin. You may be tiny and a ball of anxiety, but you have a fire in you. You can definitely do this. Besides, you’re not alone in this; I’ll help you out. Didn’t you say you wanted to destroy them? This is one way we could do that.”

“Fine. Is there any other ways to sabotage them?”

“Burn some of the files, especially the more nefarious ones. It’s too difficult to steal some and give it to the government. Taking secret photos or recording is also an option, and it’s also a good way to gather evidence on HYDRA. I have a feeling that if Bucky regains his memories, the public would not have a good image of himself, especially if they found out he was the Winter Soldier. If we expose HYDRA for what it is and reveal how much illegal experimentation they’ve done, it could save Bucky from harassment.”

“That sounds like a good plan. Oh, you mentioned a book, right?”

“Oh yeah, I totally forgot! The book is red with a star on it, and Karpov keeps it in his desk when he’s not using it. It would probably be a good idea to get ahold of the book and burn that shit to the ground. I’ll help you do that as well. That one, in my opinion is going to be the trickiest. We only have five days before Project Insight launches.” Gavin opened his mouth to ask, but Taylor interrupted him before he could.

“Don’t ask. It’s complicated and ridiculous, but I heard through a friend of mine that Captain America and his spy friend from the Battle of New York are dealing with that. Right now our main concern is destroying HYDRA from the inside out.” Gavin threw his hands up in surrender.

“Okay, I won’t pry. Seems like a pretty good plan to me. However, I do have one question in mind: what are we going to do about Bucky? We can’t just leave him here.” Taylor gave him a feral grin.

“I might have an idea or two.”

* * *

After discussing the plans more thoroughly, they decided to start immediately. Taylor was going to stay at the place they met at, hacking HYDRA and helping Gavin from there. Gavin was to go back and locate the computer rooms in order to download their files. The USB was specially designed by Taylor, who gave him a proud smile, and can hold more than enough data from HYDRA. Because they only had five days before the Soldier took off to help Project Insight go down, they had to work quickly. 

“Why do we only have five days again?” He asked Taylor, walking down the halls towards the computer room. Taylor put a comm link in his ear so it would be easier to communicate without looking suspicious.

“Because, nerd, we need to talk to Bucky before he takes off to fight his ex-best friend. They were going to do it today, but I hacked them a couple of days earlier. Five days is all I could get.” Taylor, the ever amazing friend she is, looped the footage of him cleaning up Lab 4F, which was conveniently near the computer room. 

“Okay, sounds fair. Down the left, and it should be the fifth door on the right?” He could almost hear Taylor rapidly nodding her head.

“Yup! Pretty much.” He turned the corner and approached the door. He knocked then opened the door. There were a total of five guys in there. Gavin mentally cringed. _Sorry Dr. Seward, but this is for the good of humanity!_

“Hey guys, Dr. Seward wants to talk to you. Something about hidden files and the computer not working. He thinks there might be a virus on there.” One of the guy nods and moves to stand up. _Darn, I need all of them to leave._

“No, he wants the whole team there. He’s paranoid that it won’t be fixed and that the data will be lost forever. You gotta go.” There was a brief pause when the five guys looked at each other. Gavin bit his lip. Finally, they all stood up and left the room. He mentally celebrated and checked around the hall to make sure they were gone. When the coast was clear, he went inside the room and sat in front of the nearest computer.

“Alright I’m here. What do I do?”

“Which computer are you at?” After telling her the number on the side of the computer, he heard her tapping the keys before responding.

“Got it. The password for that one is medusa45. Plug in the USB, and begin copying the files over.” Gavin did as she asked, copying the files and putting them on the USB. It took awhile, but luckily none of the guys came back early. Maybe Dr. Seward really did have a computer problem. When it finished downloading, he quickly yanked it out. He closed all the windows and shut off the computer. He looked around before making a quick exit.

As for the pictures, there wasn’t a lot of super shady experiments being done. The times Gavin was in the lab, it was usually some boring data collecting and not something a person would label as highly dangerous. He did see a couple of shady files and took pictures of them, but otherwise else, it wasn’t as successful as downloading them.

Gavin found the chance to burn some files when two days before Project Insight launched, Dr. Seward asked him to organize the files on Corridor C, ironically the place he received his first task. How they managed to become organized, Gavin has no idea.

He snorted. First, he was there to organize them, and now he’s going there to destroy them all.  
He was there to organize the files, and now he’s gonna burn them all. Taylor gave him a couple of devices that were to be attached to each file cabinet. Once that’s done, he would leave to perform another task, and she would do the honors of blowing it up. She would have to do it strategically, though. Doing it too early would possibly kill Gavin or make him prime suspect. Too late would seem out of the blue and too suspicious. 

He made his way over to the file cabinets. He heard her typing on the other end, looping the footage. He quickly implanted all the devices, looking over his shoulder once in a while. Most of the devices were planted before Taylor notified him of an approaching person. He quickly shoved the rest of the devices into his pocket and pulled out a couple of files. He pretended to be immersed in his task until a sharp rap on the door shocked him. He spined around and saw Jonathan waving at him through the glass. He let out a sigh of relief before waving back and turning back to his task. 

“Aaaaaaand now he’s gone. You’re good.” Gavin nodded but remembered that she couldn’t see him.

“Roger that,” he said. “I’m almost done anyways.” He swiftly implanted the remaining devices and closed the last one. He double checked to make sure they were all in place and organized some files to make it look like he actually did his job. He took one last look before leaving.

It took a good seven hours before she could blow it up. She looped the footage of Gavin organizing the files from when he was first there until two hours passed by. She removed the footage and waiting for an opportunity to come about. Luckily, a few high-positioned officers held a short meeting there. Some of them pulled a couple files out of the cabinets, but luckily they were the ones Gavin arranged. Taylor sighed in relief. Half an hour after the meeting ended, she hit a button on her keyboard, and the cabinets blew up. It took out the room they were in and the surrounding ones as well. She quickly retreated and covered her steps, making sure they would not be able to trace her. The guards checked the footage and made an effort to interrogate all potential suspects. Because Gavin looked average and generally harmless, they brushed over him and moved onto the next person. Gavin let out a shaky breath once they left, his heart pounding in his chest. He ran a hand through his hair, fixed his gloves, and pushed up his glasses as Taylor chuckled.

“You’re so adorable that they couldn’t bear the thought of innocent little you committing such a heinous act,” she teased. Gavin rolled his eyes as a pink blush colored his cheeks. He looked down at his hands.

“Shut up.” He mumbled, a lopsided smile on his face. Thank god that actually worked.

He’s not quite sure how he made it this far without them suspecting him, but he wouldn’t dare jinx his luck. He would need it for the next plan.

* * *

Gavin waited for Taylor to give him the signal. They didn’t know if the Winter Soldier would be able to recall Captain America or Gavin again, but it was worth a shot. The thing was, he couldn’t ask that question willy nilly or HYDRA might lay their eyes on him. The plan was to release the prisoners, distracting the guards and giving him ample time to talk to him. However, it could go horribly wrong if he doesn’t remember Gavin. They need to know whether or not he remembers the captain. His comm buzzed.

“Okay, he’s getting closer. When I say go, press the button. It will release the prisoners, giving you time to talk to him. Be careful, his memory was wiped so he doesn’t remember who you are. Good luck.” Gavin affirmed the message and lowered his hand. 

“Okay… now! Go go go!” A flashing red alarm went off all of a sudden. He heard the guards shout and run past him. The Soldier was following him, but Gavin jumped in front of him with him hands out. The Soldier stopped and narrowed his eyes.

“What do you want, kid?” Gavin put on a nervous smile.

“Hey Soldier, do you remember me? I’m Gavin, I’m the intern who… who waxed your chest and shaved your beard. I also patched you up after that particularly nasty mission you had. Please, you have to remember me!” A bright red colored his face. The Soldier looked at him apathetically.

“Get out of the way, kid. I have a job to do.” He made a move to push Gavin out of the way. Gavin started panicking. The plan was _definitely_ not going as he planned.

Time was running out fast. Desperate, he grabbed his left wrist. It would be risky, but if there’s a greater possibility to trigger his memory by showing him his hand, then it was worth it. Gavin yanked off the glove on his left hand and brought it up to his face. The Soldier’s eyes widened.

“You’ve seen my hand when I was with you! You have to remember me. There’s no way you can’t. Please, remember me, Bucky. Please.” The Soldier stared at his hand and took a step back. Gavin felt his hope drop as seconds went by. After what seemed like an eternity, the Soldier finally blinked and nodded.

“Yes, I remember you.” Gavin sighed in relief.

“Good, because I need to ask you a question. It’s urgent. Do you remember the man on the bridge? He called you Bucky. Do you know his name? Can you tell me?” He quirked an eyebrow, intrigued.

“...Yes, I do. His name is Steve. Why do you need to know?”

“Uh, thank you so much! Please don’t tell anyone I asked you this. I’ll see you later, bye!” The Soldier gave him a confused look, but nodded. He left Gavin and ran down the hallway.

Gavin let out a noise of triumph. The plan worked, despite him being skeptical at first. But now it’s clear his memories are coming back, which means their idea could work. With Taylor’s help, if he triggers the Soldier’s memories, then he could become Sergeant Barnes again. He would be humanized, and leave HYDRA. Which means, HYDRA would lose its most important asset.

Gavin grinned as he walked back to his apartment. He had plans to discuss.


	5. Chrysalis

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gavin enacts the final part of his and Taylor's plan. Will it work out? Or horribly fail?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter today! Yeah, yeah, I know it's technically Sunday, but it's still night so I'm counting that as Saturday. Can't promise that I'll post earlier, but I will definitely try.
> 
> I also made a small K-Drama reference. Shout out to person who discovers which drama I referenced. This chapter marks the end of Gavin's HYDRA years and the transition to the second part of this story. 
> 
> Next chapter will be a little surprise for you! Not the typical chapter, so stay tuned!
> 
> Hope you have a lovely day/evening, and thank you so much for reading!

Taylor and Gavin decided it would be a good idea for him to keep his head down for the next day. He already done so much to sabotage HYDRA, and if he were to do more, there would be a chance he would be caught. He kept his head down and did what he was told. The next morning, he met with Taylor and gave her the USB. She grabbed him in a hug, and he hugged back. They stayed like that for a minute before Taylor pulled away. She beamed at him. 

“That was amazing! You did everything so well. I knew you could do it.” Gavin shyly smiled back and pushed his glasses up. 

“Honestly, I wouldn’t have been able to do without your help. Hey, do you have the pictures?” Taylor nodded and pulled out the folder. Gavin opened it, and inside there was an old picture of Sergeant Bucky Barnes from World War Two and a picture of the Howling Commandos together. On the back of Bucky’s portrait was an address to a museum that contained a Bucky Barnes memorial. He sent a grateful smile towards Taylor.

“Thanks, Tay, you’re the best. Seriously, I don’t know what I would do without you. You’re the Sam to my Frodo.” Taylor smirked and gently pushed his shoulder.

“More like you’re the Sam to my Dean. The Mike to my Sully. The Ron to my Hermione,” she said. He smiled and looked away. “Too much? Eh, whatever. The point is, we’re friends no matter what. I’ve your back, and you’ve got mine. I’m always here when you need me. And either way, there would have been something you would have done. There’s no way you would sit back and let all this shit go down. You’re Gavin, the too-precious-for-this-world, wholesome do-gooder. It wouldn’t be you if you didn’t help Bucky at all.” Gavin chuckled, pulling Taylor into one last hug.

“Yeah, yeah, I know. See you soon, Tay! Stay safe.” Taylor gave him one last squeeze before letting him go. He turned around and began walking back to the facility. Several steps later, he turned around and saw Taylor waving at him. He laughed and waved back.

“You too, Gav! Try not to die!”

* * *

It was the day Project Insight was finally taking place, and the Winter Soldier was to be sent to defend the Helicarriers soon. Gavin, as he cleaned some beakers in Corridor D, tried to think of a way to give the pictures to Bucky without having Dr. Seward and the other scientists suspicious of him. Maybe he can catch the Soldier somewhere and corner him into a-- no, that’s too weird. That would take no small amount of bravery to pull off that kind of confrontation, and Gavin doesn’t have that kind of bravery. Maybe he could pass it into hand while walking by…? As he was mentally debating about what he should do, a knock from outside broke him from his reverie. He turned around and saw Dr. Seward waving at him. Gavin smiled and waved back. The doctor took that an invitation to come in. Gavin stood up and smiled at him.

“Hey doctor, what can I do for you? Any files to organize…?” The good doctor smiled back. He took a glance around the room before coming back to Gavin. Gavin felt a spike of dread crawl down his spine, a sense of foreboding invading his senses. He ran a hand through his hair and forced himself to maintain eye contact with the doctor. Said man took a deep breath before saying the next few words. 

“Your next task is to help the Winter Soldier suit up.” Gavin’s eyes widened. He stood there staring at Dr. Seward, gaping like a fish. He eventually closed his mouth and stared questionably at the doctor.

“Help Bu-the Soldier suit up? That’s strange, why can’t he do that himself? I mean, he’s a grown man.” Dr. Seward chuckled and gave him a reassuring look. His eye held a gentle, almost grandfatherly twinkle in them. 

“It’ll go faster if you helped. He seems more calm around you than anyone else. Just go and get it done, please” Gavin narrowed his eyes.

“What kind of logic is that?” he muttered. Dr. Seward winks and leans closer to Gavin. He gently grabbed Gavin’s left arm.

“I know what you’ve been doing these past couple of days,” he whispered. Gavin’s eyes widened. He tried to move backwards, but Dr. Seward held onto him. “Don’t worry, I don’t plan on telling the higher ups. I’ve been working here for a long time, and I have to admit, there were many moments where I wished I could’ve intervened and said, ‘That’s enough.’ I was too much of a coward to stand up to HYDRA, but with you here, there is much more hope. Free the Winter Soldier and help him reclaim his memories. He deserves to be free after everything this wretched organization has done to him. He’s the most comfortable around you, so you’re the best candidate to help him out. This is a favor I must ask you to do. And don’t worry about destroying HYDRA. There’s a few people here who hate them too. We’ll do our best to take them down once you’re gone. You’ve inspired us to take action and stand up to injustice. Don’t worry, Gavin, we’ve got you. We all got you.” Gavin was speechless. He had no idea that Dr. Seward was inspired by him, albeit knowing what he was doing from that start. To say he was touched was an understatement.

“T-thank you so, so much, Dr. Seward. I-I really don't know what to say. Just… thank you. Thank you so much for your support.” The genial doctor smiled and patted Gavin’s shoulder in a gentle manner. 

“It really is no problem, son. Just continue doing the best. You’re a great kid, Gavin. HYDRA doesn’t deserve you or your kindness.” Gavin smiled gratefully. It was nice to have some support from his coworkers. It gave him enough confidence to create another plan in light of the new events.

Dr. Seward gave him to directions to where the Soldier was located. Gavin quickly made his way to Corridor F, nervous yet fidgety with excitement. He couldn’t wait to give him the photos and help him fight HYDRA’s conditioning. Also, Gavin was honestly surprised about how things were going. He couldn’t believe it was that easy to meet with the Soldier. It just came naturally to him, as if some god up above answered his prayer. This opportunity would allow him to secretly give him the pictures without being noticed. Taking a deep breath, he turned to the door and gently knocked. 

“It’s Gavin again. I’ve been asked by Dr. Seward to help you suit up,” he said. In a hushed voice, he added, “Don’t know why though. You’re capable of doing that yourself.” He heard some scuffling before a gruff voice answered him. 

“Alright, come in.” Gavin ran a hand through hair before opening the door. The Soldier was facing him, wearing a black tank top and pants. He was just about to put on his belt. Gavin gulped as he gently closed the door behind him and walked up to the Soldier. The Soldier was staring at him more intensely than usual. Gavin blushed and anxiously fiddled with his gloves. Trying to stay neutral but epically failing, he sent an awkward smile towards the Soldier’s way. He swore he saw a twinkle of amusement in the other’s eyes.

“I-is there anything I can help you with?” The Soldier nodded towards his vest. Gavin nodded and grabbed it from the table. Gavin helped him put it on, strapping the sides to keep it secure. He noticed that there was a pocket on the left side of his vest. After adjusting the vest, he took out the photos from his coat pocket and gently slid it into the pocket. The Soldier looked at him, puzzled. He reached towards the pocket to inspect them, but Gavin, panicking, grabbed his hand before he could. The assassin looked at him, eyebrow quirked. Gavin then realized what he was doing and looked away, face red in embarrassment. He almost drop the Soldier’s hand, but adjusted his grip. He looked back at the Soldier after recollecting himself, putting a finger to his lips.

“No, don’t look at it here. Do it when you’re absolutely alone, okay? The location must be absolutely secure. No one else is allowed to look at it. Only you.” The Soldier slowly nodded, never taking his eyes off Gavin. They stared at each other for a long time, until Gavin awkwardly turned away and coughed. His eyes flitted from the floor to the Soldier’s face. 

“B-be safe, alright? Try not to die. See you later, Bucky.” He turned quickly on his feet, and walked out the door.

He never saw the Soldier’s amused gaze trailing after him, nor the upturn of the corner of his lips.

* * *

“Are you sure you wanna go through with this? We can always get it some other time.” Gavin peered around the corner and noted that there were two guards standing in front of Karpov’s office. He looked away and pressed his back against the wall. A red book with a black star drawn on with Sharpie was in his left hand.

“No, I need to do this. I don’t know when the next time I’ll be able to do it. I-I have to do it. For Bucky.” 

“Alrighty then,” he said. He swore he could hear her smirk on the other end of the line. “Hmm, you sure seem pretty _interested_ in that Bucky guy. You sure you don’t have a crush on him?” Gavin jumped, covering his mouth so his gasp wouldn’t be heard by the guards.

“W-what? No! I-I don’t have a crush on him,” he quietly hissed, looking around to see if anyone was watching him. Beside Taylor, that is. “I don’t h-have a crush on _anybody_! What you talking about? T-this isn’t relevant to what we’re doing now! W-we have a mission to focus on, darn it! So where is Karpov located? Does he have the book on him?” Gavin glared at the wall across from him as Taylor snickered.

“You do know this isn’t over. I will find out. Not today, but someday.” Taylor typed quickly, eyes scanning the screen in front of her. “It seems that he’s in a meeting with a couple of scientists. It doesn’t seem like he has the book on him. I’ll activate the sprinklers in a lab a hallway down from where you are. It should give you enough time to get in, take the book and replace it with the one we made, and get out. Once you’re out, I’ll delete the footage and replace it with some footage from earlier. Copy?”

“Copy that.” He heard Taylor typing on her keyboard again. After a few minutes, he heard the guards shout, footsteps thudding away from him. He checked quickly to see if they were watching him. When the coast was clear, he quickly turned the corner and power-walked to Karpov’s office. He punched in the code he had seen Karpov put in earlier and walked inside. He began searching the desk, looking on top and around. He opened a few drawers, gently but quickly going through them. He finally found it in the lowest shelf on the right side of his desk. He took it out and replace it with the fake one. He was about to get up before he heard footsteps coming back. He gasped and immediately crouched down.

“Taylor,” he whispered into his mic. “What’s going on out there?”

“Fuck, the guards came back quicker than I anticipated. Hold on, I’m working on it.” He zoned out of Taylor’s frantic typing and he focused on keeping his breath steady and quiet. He felt anxiety bubbling and churning in his stomach, a cold flush overcoming his body. His hands felt shaky, and he almost dropped the book in fear. He checked to see if the guards were there, and unfortunately for him, they were. They stood in front of the door, guns in their hand. Gavin gulped. He definitely wasn’t in the mood to be shot today. 

Suddenly, the guards shouted. They ripped off their earpiece in pain, cursing and grunting. 

“Damn things,” he heard one say. “I thought these were fixed last week!”

“Guess not,” said the other. “Better get new ones quick before Boss finds out and gets mad.” They stomped away, leaving Gavin trembling and sighing heavily with relief. He quickly scrambled from his hiding place and walked out the door. He looked around the hallway before walking back to his apartment, shaky but victorious smile on his face. He could hear Taylor jumping in her seat.

“OH MY GOD,” he heard her scream. “I thought you were gonna die! Holy shit! Holy fucking shit! I can’t believe that worked! Oh my god, I need to lay down for a moment. That was too much for my heart to handle. Oh Jesus.” Gavin laughed as he ran a hand through his hair. He was still trying to recover from his near-death experience.

“Too much for _your_ heart to handle? I felt my heart stop for a second there.” Taylor laughed as she erased the footage. 

“Hey Gavin? Let’s promise never to do that again.” Gavin nodded his head, a smile playing on his lips.

“Oh yeah, totally. That’s enough excitement for me.”

* * *

“Are you really leaving?” It was the beginning of September and almost time for Gavin to head back to university to finish his last year of undergrad. The rest of his internship at HYDRA “Industries” was filled with menial work and analyzing data for experiments. He got to perform hands-on experiment once in a while, but other than that, it was uneventful. He was glad he had finished it with all of his limbs intact. He recently had a chat with Dr. Seward, and in an exchange of heartfelt words and sad smiles, he bid goodbye to the man who had mentored him those past few months. He went back to his room to pack away the last of his things before officially moving out. Jonathan swung by to say goodbye. He leaned on the doorway, arms crossed and sad pout on his lips.

“Yup, I received all my credits and my final paycheck today. It’s official.” Jonathan nodded. He walked toward Gavin and gave him a tight hug. Gavin patted his back, a bittersweet smile on his face.

“Aw man, it’s really sad to see you go. It was nice to have someone to sit with during lunch. But I’m glad you’re getting out. At least one of us needs to get away from this shit syndicate.” Gavin chuckled and laid a hand on Jonathan’s shoulder.

“Bye Jonathan. It was great being friends with you. Hope your dad gets better and that somebody you’ll be able to leave to.” Jonathan smiled sadly at him.

“Thanks Gavin. Hope you enjoy the rest of uni! I’ll text you. Take care.” Gavin dropped his hand as Jonathan made his way out the door.

“You too! You better text soon. Bye, Jonathan!” He waved at his only friend in the facility. Jonathan waved back and went back to his apartment. Gavin finished packing away the last of his stuff before lifting it up.

He took a step forward and looked behind him. His apartment for those few months were cleaned out, most of his boxes already in his car. All he had left was the box currently in his arms. He faced forward, a smile on his face. He began his long trek out of the facility and into parking lot. He would then make a several days trip driving from the facility all the way back home in California. He briefly wondered how Bucky was doing without him.

 _I hope he’s okay_ , he thought. _He’s free, that’s all that matters now._

Gavin smiled at himself. Things were looking pretty good so far. Maybe he would even get to meet Bucky Barnes once again. But hey, what are the odds?

* * *

He gently grasped the photo, fingers lightly touching the edges. He stared at it imploringly, a flurry of emotions brewing inside of him. He turned it over and read the message on the back. When he finished reading it, there was only one word in his mind.

_Gavin._


	6. Snowstorm (Interlude)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky's POV after the Helicarrier showdown. A man who doesn't know who he is or what he's doing. Oh, and he may or may not be thinking about Gavin from time to time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was the special chapter I was talking about! We dive right into Bucky's POV. This is the interlude chapter that transitions from HYDRA years to... well, you'll find out. 
> 
> Thank you so much for reading, and have a nice day!
> 
> -Sloth

“I’m with you till the end of the line.” That was what the man _\-- Steve, his best friend--_ said to him, the sudden recognition of his friend hitting him like a punch to the stomach. A couple of memories flitted through his mind. The Asset _\-- Bucky, that’s what he called him--_ didn’t even have the chance to sort them out before his idiot of a friend _\--mission, his mission--_ fell from the Helicarrier. Before he knew it, he had jumped out and dove straight into the river. He found him and managed to drag his friend’s body _\-- no, his mission’s, NO STEVIE’S--_ over to the side of the river before collapsing in an exhausted heap next to him. He looked at his miss-- _Stevie’s_ unconscious body. The Asset, the Soldier, Bucky, whatever he was, pushed himself up and walked over to Steve and knelt down next to him. He put two fingers on his neck and tilted his head. His pulse and breathing were steady. Good. _Good, why was that good? He’s your mission! Kill him,_ a voice whispered in the back of his head. The Asset shook his head. Something inside him made him think that what Stevie _\-- mission, Stevie, Mission, STEVIE--_ said was true. 

_No no no, he is your enemy, you should eliminate him,_ a voice said. Another voice peeped in. _Then why did I pull him out of the river?_ Silence.

The Asset shook himself out of his reverie. There was no time to dawdle and ponder about things. It was only a matter of time before SHIELD or some other government entity tries to track him down. He had to go _now_. He took one last look at Stevie’s body before walking through the foliage surrounding the river and into the city. He found an old car nearby and hotwired it, jumping in and taking off as fast as he could. He didn’t stop until he reached the next state over, which happened to be Virginia. His body _\-- the Asset’s or Bucky’s?--_ was on autopilot, going through the motions as his mind tried to repress the memories. A small, hazy memory of he and Stevie watching cars go by as they ate ice cream popped up, but he quickly suppressed it. He couldn’t afford to experience all the emotions that came with memories. Right now, his main priority was to disappear, and disappear he shall. Bucky _\-- the Soldier? The soldier inside of him? The soldier from World War Two?--_ retreated into his mind as the Asset drove them to a shopping mall nearby.

He swiped a wallet from the back pocket of some poor unsuspecting man and walked into the mall. As he walked into the first store he saw, a memory floated to the front of his mind. The Great Depression was in full swing, and his family were no exception. In order to help his parents put food on the table, he decided to steal. He felt guilty about committing such an act, but the thought of his sisters going hungry won him over. He crept behind an important looking businessman and with a sneaky hand, swiped the man’s wallet and ran back home to his parents. When he opened the door with the wallet in hand and a triumphant smile on his face, his mother instantly scolded him and forced him to return the wallet. In the current day, he felt that same twinge of guilt in his chest, but brushed it away. His mother _\-- was it really his mother?--_ was not here to scold him.

He dully browsed through the selection of clothes until he decided on a few dark-colored shirts and pants, a jacket, a baseball cap, and a bag. On his way to the changing rooms, he saw a few reading glasses on display. He picked one up and inspected it. It was large and had thick frames, similar to the one Gavin had. The mousy little intern was always pushing his glasses up even though he was too shy to look someone in the eye. Bucky chuckled in amusement, until he realized something.

Gavin! The intern put something in his pocket. He quickly made his way into the nearest changing room, dumping all of his clothes on the bench inside. He took off his vest and reached into the pocket on the left side, pulling out what seemed to be two photos. The first one was a black-and-white portrait of himself, wearing his World War Two uniform. That Bucky _\-- I’m Bucky, am I Bucky? Is that the same person… me?--_ had short hair and a playful smile on his face. His eyes were twinkling with mirth, an emotion unfamiliar to the Asset. The second photo contained a group of men smiling and laughing at the camera. He immediately recognized the man in the middle was Stevie in his old war uniform. Standing on his right with his left arm slung across his broad shoulders was himself, head tilted back in deep belly laughter. He felt that he knew these people, but could not recall their names or what their group was called. He knew they formed after Steve freed them from that war prison…

A huge wave of memories flooded his mind, crashing into him seemingly out of nowhere. Meeting the sickly kid being beaten up in an alley, pulling him out of fights, joining the 107th Infantry Regiment, the Howling Commandos, and… falling off the train. Zola, HYDRA, new arm, Fist of HYDRA, torture, pain, and more pain…!

He sunk to the ground, clutching his head in agony. He clenched his teeth, desperately trying to will the memories away. His head began to throb as the memories blurred together and swarmed around him in some sort of fucked-up metaphorical tornado. He felt caught in a storm with no way out. His mind was in chaos as the Asset part of him and the Bucky part of fought for dominance in his mind. Every muscle was tense, and it took everything in him not to scream and rip his hair out. He shakily brought his hands down, looking at them in confusion. Whose body was it, anyways? The Asset? Bucky? Who even was he? Did he even own his body? His hands felt like they didn’t belong to him. The skin on his flesh hand felt tingly as the storm continued to whirl around him. It felt like he was a character in a game, and the minute he blinked, his hand would be gone and he would be no more. 

Suddenly, a voice presented itself in his mind. A soft, gentle voice quietly singing a lullaby in Russian. “ _Spi mladenets, moy prekrasný. Bayushki bayu_ ,” it sang. His muscles instantly relaxed. His grip on his head lessened as he leaned onto the wall behind him. He swore he could feel a ghost of a cold, bony hand grip his shoulder in reassurance. The voice continued to sing. “ _Tikho smotrit myesyats yasný f kolýbyel tvayu. Stanu skazývat' ya skazki, pyesenki spayu tý-zh dremli, zakrývshi glazki, bayushki bayu_.”

He opened his eyes and took a couple of deep breaths. Hearing that voice _\-- why did it seem so familiar?--_ sing strangely helped him calm down. The memories receded, and Bucky emerged into the changing room. He flexed his hands a couple of times, reassuring himself that those were his hands and not anybody else’s. After a few minutes of recollecting himself, he stood up and changed his clothes. He put the photos into his front jean pocket and shoved the remainder of his clothes in the bag. He quickly paid for them and jumped into his car, driving around the town before coming upon a slightly run-down motel. After a few words with the receptionist, he got himself a small room with one bed. Closing the door behind him, the Asset quickly scanned the room and checked for possible exits and weapons. 

As he stared at the ceiling, he began to brood over the most recent events. By saving his mission _\-- Stevie, goddammit--_ , he betrayed HYDRA thus painting a target over his back. But HYDRA is the only thing he knows. He doesn’t have any family or friends to turn to for help (beside Steve, that is). This wasn’t the 1940s anymore; this was the 21st century, a place, an America where he didn’t belong. Where could he go? It seemed like the world was laughing at his misfortune. A new thought crawled into his head: maybe it would be easier to go back to HYDRA. Sure, they would torture him, but at least he was somewhere that he was familiar with. The Asset was something he felt he knew the best. He spent years assassinating people for HYDRA and having his memories wiped. It was something, a routine he was used to. There was comfort in doing the same thing over and over. Confronting the new onslaught of memories and dealing with his old identity would mean a whole lot of confusion and pain. What good would that kind of information be to him?

 _You would have an identity at least_ , said a voice in his head. _You would be someone, have a name instead of a nameless face._

The memories of him and Steve hanging out and being friends came back to him, floating around him in a tantalizing manner. He swatted the air as if trying to bat away annoying flies. No, no, that wasn’t his memories! He was the Asset, he had no family or friends. He was the Fist of HYDRA, an important weapon and member. He had purpose and a place. He doesn’t need those useless memories.

Then who the hell is Bucky? Was Bucky really him? It felt like he had a goody two-shoes identical twin. It couldn’t be possible that he used to be James Buchanan Barnes, right?

Then why did the memories feel so real? He could hear his mother’s laughter, feel Steve’s bony shoulders under his finger, and smell the tender aroma of hot dogs from the Hector’s Hotdogs vendor. He could taste the chocolate ice cream he ate with Steve as they watched the cars. The tall buildings of Brooklyn, the trees in Europe, the tacky costume Steve was forced to wear when he toured the States were so vivid and vibrant when he closed his eyes and remembered. There was no way he could recall memories so vivid and alive if he had a twin. He had to be Bucky; there was just no way! Besides, by betraying HYDRA, there was no turning back. He could not return to HYDRA.

But what about Steve? Steve was his best friend, surely he could help him. But he recalled looking at those bright blue eyes on the Helicarrier, full of sadness and desperation. No, no way. He couldn’t go to Steve either. It was just too painful. His hands began to tremble. As the Asset, he was so used to feeling control and having things turned out correctly. Never did he missed a target or made a mistake. He was the Winter Soldier, the perfect assassin. He never made any mistakes. But for the first time in his life, he felt like things were spiraling out of control. This whirlwind of emotions and memories were beyond his control. He felt like a scared little kid, lost and confused. He desperately wished he could make sense of it all, pull himself together, but before he could get a good grasp of the reins, the memories dashed away and twittered with malicious glee. He didn’t know what to do anymore. Groaning, he threw his arm over his head. What he would do to make things go back to the way it was.

He stayed like that for a couple of days. He woke up, ate breakfast, brooded, made sure he was covering his tracks well, eat lunch, patrol, brood some more, patrol, and finally sleep. If he could sleep, that is. The swarm of memories would attack him in the middle of the night. He would spend hours and hours trying to make sense of the fuckery that was his mind. Each time he failed and fell asleep exhausted and defeated. 

Honestly, he didn’t really know what to do. He’s too busy being bombarded by memories left and right to figure out what to do exactly. Bits and pieces of his past surfaced in his mind, a jigsaw puzzle desperate to put itself together. The pieces that came up, however, were random and vague. He could only catch wisps of them before they disappeared. Sometimes, he latched on a few memories and replayed him in his head, enjoying the vivid scenes in his head. A lot of them drift would appear for a few minutes then drift away from him, floating away before he could grab ahold of it. A part of him desperately wanted to cry, but he immediately stamped that feeling down every time it came up. He was the Winter Soldier, the Asset. The Winter Soldier does not cry or show any emotion at all. The perfect assassin. But he wasn’t really an assassin anymore, was he?

He could hear his father’s voice in his head, telling him to be a man and suck it up. If he cried, that would mean he was weak. And Bucky _\-- the Soldier, the Asset, whatever the fuck he is--_ was not weak. He was a sergeant in the army. Sergeants were tough and most certainly did not cry.

Wow, he really was one fucked up piece of shit. No idea who the fuck he was, a man just rotting away in some dingy motel room-- he really was pathetic. Can’t even think properly before being sucked into a mental clusterfuck. He chuckled sardonically. Who the fuck would want to deal with him?

He stuck a hand in the pocket of jeans, hoping to find a stick of gum he could chew on. It gave him something to do when he didn’t want the memories to haunt him again. Instead, he touched paper and remembered the photos in his pocket. He took them out and looked at them again. He flipped the back of his portrait and was surprised to see an address. He recognized the address belonged to the Smithsonian Institution. _Exhibit 14 on the second floor_ , it read. Intrigued, he flipped the picture of the Howling Commandos. There was a message from the intern Gavin on it.

 _Hi Bucky_ , it read. _I hope these pictures are helpful to you! I figured you would need some help remembering yourself. I hope you stay safe and eat well. Take care of yourself, okay? I hope things get better for you. Love, Gavin._

 _Love, Gavin._ Gavin, the little intern knew! He was trying to help him from the start! Everything that was troubling him melted away as the face of Gavin came into his mind. He ran through everything he had on Gavin.

The intern was sweet and shy boy with brown hair and eyes. Kindhearted, but socially awkward, he is always nervous and has difficulty maintaining eye contact. When he first came into the room, he looked like a scared mouse ready to bolt at the slightest of moves. Bucky was tense and ready for the intern to sneer at or shirk away from him. Despite being completely afraid, Gavin approached Bucky and was even kind enough to warn him about the pain that coming with waxing. HYDRA would not hesitate to torture him. This boy was so different and kind than the others. Why was he working for HYDRA? 

And his hand. What happened? Why is his left hand skeletal? What caused him to be that way? Questions fluttered his mind as he thought about the enigma that was Gavin. How could someone be so kind when everyone around him was cold and cruel? He was a flower growing on a twisted thicket of brambles. A warm, comforting cup of coffee on a cold, winter day. So delicate and innocent, Bucky wanted to wrap his arms around him and protect him from the evils of the world. He shook his head. No, he would not do that. The Asset was a cold, ruthless killer. A monster. A beast of no nation. The Soldier must stay away from Gavin in order to protect him from himself. 

But as the day went by, his mind kept going back to Gavin. How he awkwardly smiled and looked away. How he ran his hand through his hair and bit his lip when he was nervous. How he first stumbled over his words when he first met the Soldier to when he gently told him to look at the photos later. How he scrunched up the right side of his face when concentrating. Despite his nervousness, he was always kind and soothing. His presence made Bucky feel calm, the memories and the torrent of emotions that came with it would fade away at the thought of Gavin. He remembered that Gavin was the one who sang that lullaby. When the night was too loud or too silent, Gavin’s voice would come and sing him back to sleep. The intern would never fail to calm the Soldier and put the Asset asleep.

Bucky wondered if he would ever see him again. He honestly hoped so.

* * *

The next morning, he decided he had enough of lazing around. He was the Winter Soldier for Christ’s sake, how could he let himself get this low? He decided to visit the museum and learn more about himself. He quickly packed up his things and hopped in the car. Despite fearing that Steve was going to discover him, he drove back to DC. As he finally stood in front of the Smithsonian, a trickle of trepidation wormed its way into his mind. What if he didn’t like what he saw? Would this new information bring him another flurry of memories? But he won’t know until he goes in and sees the exhibit himself. Besides, Gavin gave him the museum’s address, there must be something there that can help him. With a newfound sense of determination, he marched into the museum with hope trailing his steps.

* * *

In another state, a young man straightened his tie and prepared for an interview. Taking a deep breath and running a hair through his hair, he walked through the doors. Three people, two men and one woman, sat in front of him. The woman smiled at him and gestured for him to sit down.

“Hello, Mr. Willoughby, welcome to Stark Industries. You’re applying for the internship?” He smiled as he fiddled with his gloves.

“Yes I am.”


	7. Several Years Later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Several years after Gavin leaves HYDRA.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really have to stop posting after midnight. I keep saying I'll post on Saturdays, but technically it's Sunday right now. Crap. Anyways, this is where the story becomes even more canon divergent. Mutants also exist in this world, but the X-Men will not appear because it will make things more complicated, and I did not originally plan to have them here. Unedited because it's late and I'm a terrible person.
> 
> Thank you for reading, and have a nice day.
> 
> -Sloth

Gavin woke up to the sound of his alarm blaring. Groaning, he drowsily shut it off and got up from his bed. After washing up and getting dressed in a gray button-up and black skinny jeans, he slipped on his favorite pair of sneakers and left his apartment. He bought a bagel and a cup of coffee while on his way to the subway station. He checked his watch. 8:10. Good, he had enough time to make it to work. A quick ride from the subway brought him to the Stark Tower, formerly known as the Avengers Tower. He smiled as he entered the building, waving genially at the receptionist before making his way over to the elevator. He pressed the button for the 85th floor and waited patiently as the elevator began to ascend. He mulled over the events that occured within the last several years.

It’s been three years since he left HYDRA. When he arrived home in California, he greeted his mother and told her everything that happened. She was sympathetic and let him cry on his shoulder when he needed to. With encouragement from his mother, he burned the wretched red book he took from HYDRA and celebrated with freedom with Taylor. When fall quarter finally came around, he went back to university, ready to complete his final year. Halfway into the quarter, he decided to search for Professor Hoffman and confront him, but things didn’t go as he planned.

When he inquired his professors and fellow students about Professor Hoffman, he discovered that the professor resigned and practically disappeared without a trace. Gavin tried to track him down, but to no avail. He asked Taylor to help him, but instead she encouraged him to give up the search and return to his studies. 

“It’s not worth your time and energy. Just leave the past behind and move forward. Let that coward get what’s coming to him,” she said. Gavin decided that it was best to listen to her and spent his last year studying and hanging out with Taylor. On some occasions, thoughts about his past would surface in his mind. Is HYDRA onto him? Does he need to move? How was Jonathan doing? Did his dad beat cancer yet? How was Mr. Seward? Is he still alive? Did he escape HYDRA too?

How was Bucky doing?

That one question haunted him the most. After aiding his escape from HYDRA, the intern couldn’t get rid of the assassin from his mind. Everywhere he went, the look on his face when they stared at each other haunted him. They lingered in the back of his mind when he was in class and hung on the fringes of his dreams at night. He did not go a day without thinking of Bucky in some shape or form. Gavin fretted about the possibility of Bucky forgetting the pictures and bemoaned the idea of Bucky repressing his memories. He hoped that the assassin was breaking free of HYDRA and was searching for his identity. But for now, he’ll have to stick with fretting and daydreaming.

* * *

Several weeks before he graduated, he discovered a _legal_ internship that was being offered by Stark Industries. A lot of people were applying for this position, for real this time, and it would be difficult to get the position. Gavin was excited about the prospect of working for the Tony Stark, but was hesitant about applying for another internship after his last one went sour. Taylor and his mother assured him that it was perfectly fine. They even made a call and sent an email to Stark Industries confirm that it was indeed a legitimate internship. After a few days of contemplation and aggressive reassurance from Taylor, he finally decided to apply. Taylor, along with a bunch of her hacker friends, volunteered to help Gavin cover up his connection with HYDRA, much to his relief and gratitude. 

He remembered the rush of emotions he felt when Stark Industries called and told him they wanted an interview with him. He jumped on the earliest flight he could get to New York and made his way over to the prestigious tower. He remembered how intimidated he felt as he stood underneath it’s looming shadow. He could remember the shaking of knees and stickiness of his sweat gathering in crevices of his gloves as the elevator ascended. The minute he walked into the room and saw that stern, professional faces, he had a feeling he would be instantly rejected. It took an incredible amount of willpower not to dash out and hide underneath the covers of his hotel bed. It was safe to say at the end of the interview he was thoroughly embarrassed. When he closed his eyes at the end of the interview, humiliated and waiting for their rejection, he was pleasantly surprised that they accepted him. He blushed and unfroze from his spot when the woman across from him had to repeat her words. He couldn’t believe he managed to score an internship under one of the most, if not the most, illustrious companies in the United States! He numbly listened to his interviewers informed him of the details and expectations that came with the internship. His internship, like HYDRA, was paid and the company assured him that they would be willing to pay for living expenses and such. Before they said their goodbyes to him, Gavin was already thinking of what to bring to New York from his home in California.

He spilled the beans at his mother’s salon. Taylor had come in to get her eyebrows done, and with the influx of customers that came with the summer’s unrelenting heat, he volunteered to help his mother run the salon. As he waxed his best friend’s eyebrows, he decided it would be a good time to tell her the good news.

“Hey Taylor, about the internship… ” he began. Taylor’s shot open and looked at him with worry. She began to sit up, but Gavin pushed her down before she could.

“Oh my god, did they reject you? Fuck, Gavin, I’m so sorry--” Gavin waved his hands frantically.

“No, no, no! Actually, I was going to tell you they accepted me.” Taylor’s eyes widen and moved to sit up again. He pushed her back down. “Lay down, I can’t make your eyebrows look fabulous if you keep bobbing up and down like a chicken.”

“They accepted you? Jesus, that’s amazing! I knew you would get it. You’re too brilliant to go unrecognized. I’m glad they accepted you--”

“Accepted who?” His mother walked in carrying a tray with two cartons of banana milk on it. Gavin turned and stood up, rushing into his mother’s arms. She let out an oomph, not expecting the hug, but chuckled and returned his hug with one arm. Gavin released her and beamed a brilliant smile.

“Stark Industries. They accepted me. I’m gonna be an intern for Stark Industries!” His mother let out a boisterous shout of glee before embracing him tightly. Gavin could see in the corner of his eye Taylor giving him a thumbs up.

“Oh, Gavin, I’m so proud of you! My baby boy is so smart, getting an internship from Stark Industries. Oh, I can’t wait to tell the ladies at bingo night. They’ll be so jealous!” She gave Gavin a quick kiss on the cheek before setting down the tray of banana milk. Once she left, Taylor sat up and smirked at Gavin.

“Aw, what a mama’s boy! Who’s a good boy? You are! You are!” she teased, making kissy faces at him. Gavin rolled his eyes as he picked up a wooden spatula and dunked it in the hot wax.

“Sit back down Taylor, or I’ll wax off your entire left eyebrow!”

* * *

A few weeks later, his mother and Taylor helped him move into a small flat a couple blocks from the tower. It wasn’t until they were about to leave when Gavin voiced his concerns.

“What if this isn’t a good idea? What if they end up discovering about my internship with HYDRA and kicking me out? I’ll be blacklisted and unable to get a job at all! Even McDonald’s wouldn’t hire a person who used to work for HYDRA.” Taylor put a hand on his shoulder and gave him a reassuring smile.

“Gav, don’t worry about it. My boys and I got it covered. And besides, this marks a fresh start from HYDRA. A new internship that comes with new, less life-threatening experiences-- come on, this is too good of an opportunity to pass up,” she said. She paused but then continued. “Hey, if you’re not feeling too good or need some support, I’m just a text away. Don’t be afraid to ask for help, Gav. I’ve got your back.” His mother thunked him gently on the forehead.

“Listen to Taylor, honey. This is a good chance for you to grow and make new friends.” Taylor snickered as Gavin let out a groan. He hugged good-naturedly before bringing the two women in an embrace.

“Alright,, I’ll try.” He let go of them and waved as they walked toward the elevator. “Bye Mom. Bye Taylor. I’ll talk to you later!”

He just hoped that his superior and his coworkers were as nice as Dr. Seward and Jonathan were. 

* * *

 

His first several weeks working in the Stark Tower was much more pleasant than he ever imagined it to be. On the first day, he met a spunky, outgoing brunette woman named Darcy Lewis. She worked as an intern and “official science wrangler” for Dr. Jane Foster, a world-renowned astrophysicist and ex-girlfriend of Thor. She used to work independently until Stark approached her and offered her the position of head researcher at his company. She accepted, bringing along Darcy and another well-known scientist, Dr. Selvig. The two interns instantly clicked, and she quickly became his best friend in the Tower.

Ironically, his superior turned out to be none other than Dr. Foster, who quickly asked him to call her Jane. They became friends after an incident involved three cups of coffee and a nasty energy converter prototype that nearly blasted him into pieces. Two years later, Dr. Bruce Banner, also known as the Hulk, joined them and frequently collaborated with Jane on different projects. Darcy and Gavin would get together to chat and complain about how the two scientists were too absorbed in their work to take care of themselves. He soon got close to Dr. Banner, bonding over their shyness and love of classical music. Work was enjoyable, and Gavin looked forward to discussing data analyses and variety of other topics with his new friends everyday. 

After a year of working diligently under Jane, she approached him one day and asked him if would like to have a permanent job working as her assistant. Heart skipping a beat, Gavin ecstatically said yes. He couldn’t believe his luck. He thought he would have a simple internship then leave to find another job. To have a permanent job working for his friend and under Stark Industries? That was more than he could ask for. 

Gavin shook his head as the elevator reached the 85th floor. With a quick thanks to FRIDAY, Stark’s AI, he threw away his coffee cup and made his way over to the lab, ready to start another day of work.

* * *

There was a lot that happened between the years Gavin left HYDRA and joined Stark Industries. After Project Insight failed and the Winter Soldier escaped, Steve Rogers and his friends resumed their everyday lives, once in awhile searching for the missing assassin. The world, unaware of the events that occurred, kept spinning at its average pace. It wouldn’t be until a next year that a cyclone of great change would descend upon them. Before they knew it, Ultron, a brainchild of Tony Stark’s mind, emerged and began his rage upon the world. The Avengers, with two new members, managed to stop Ultron from destroying the human race. Unfortunately, the people around them were not left intact. Sokovia, the country where the fight happened, was left in shambles, and the world descended upon them like piranhas, frenzied and merciless. 

The United Nations, along with one Secretary Ross, attempted to implement the Sokovian Accords in order to keep the Avengers in check. People began to fear the Avengers. The ruin of Sokovia gave the world a new perspective on superheroes: while they fought villains and any other creature that threatened humanity, it didn’t stop them from damaging their surroundings. Protests began, and the Accords even divided the Avengers themselves. While Stark was willing to sign them, Rogers advocated free will and refused to sign himself away to the government. A compromise seemed nearly impossible with the rising tension until a couples of hackers led by a person named redrider24 revealed shady information about Secretary Ross and other members of the United Nations. They claimed that not only were the members of the UN corrupt and performed a plethora of illegal dealings, the Accords would infringe on the rights of any enhanced individual, or mutants as they are called. This would eventually lead the United States and the world around them to create laws that took away their basic human rights and become everything they were fighting against in World War Two. Who knows if a member of the UN decides to come up with the idea of placing mutants in a labor camp? They were already illegally experimenting on them as it was.

It was safe to say that the public was not happy and switched sides from the United Nations to the superheroes. Stark ended up declining to sign the Accords and siding with Rogers. After a few public appearances by the Avengers and many peaceful protests, the Accords were eventually retracted. However, this didn’t mean the world was at peace. Gavin’s heart certainly wasn’t when news about Bucky began to appear on his television.

A bomb went off during the Vienna conference, killing King T’Chaka of Wakanda. Many fingers pointed to the Winter Soldier, but redrider24 and her group of compadres quickly released evidence that it was not the Winter Soldier, but in fact a former Sokovian intelligence officer named Helmut Zemo. He was quickly apprehended, and Prince T’Challa of Wakanda, who planned to kill the Winter Soldier in revenge, apologized to the assassin and offered to help him recover his memories. A couple months later, he emerged from Wakanda reformed and with a shiny new arm, courtesy of princess Shuri. Unfortunately, the positive light on the Winter Soldier wavered as new information was released from anti-superhero hackers. The Winter Soldier was revealed to not only be a deadly assassin credited with numerous assassinations over the years, including the deaths of Howard and Maria Stark, but Captain America’s right hand man James Buchanan Barnes. The public was torn; some wanted Barnes to be killed in penance for his crimes, but other sympathized with him. Redrider24 and her group of hackers went into work once more and released information about HYDRA and their illegal human experimentation and files on the Winter Soldier, files that revealed all the torture and brainwashing he endured. They also included government files about illegal experiments performed on various mutants to rub salt in the wound. It didn’t take long before the public was in favor of pardoning Bucky. As the public wished, he was pardoned by the UN and made an official Avenger. During this time new people also joined the Avengers, including the Spiderman of Queens and the Ant-Man and the Wasp of San Francisco, although they stayed where they were, protecting their hometown. Black Panther, another superhero that emerged, was made an Avenger too even though he was mostly working in Wakanda. Gavin was grateful that Bucky managed to recover and found his old friend again. He hoped that he was doing well and making friends with his fellow Avengers. A chat with Darcy revealed that Bucky had taken refuge in the new Avengers facility that was built.

While he was glad Bucky was okay, Gavin feared meeting him again. He was terrified of that if he ran into Bucky again that a) he would remember Gavin and report him to Stark, resulting in his termination or b) he wouldn’t recognize Gavin at all. The latter thought made his heart feel heavy. He couldn’t imagine the Bucky forgetting him, but then again, if he did remember him, there was a chance that the assassin would rat him out. To stay safe, he decided it was best never to cross paths with him again. He bemoaned the fact that his life was a huge complication of life-threatening events and emotionally repressed supersoldiers. 

After a few lengthy conversations, Gavin discovered a lot of things happened in Jane’s life too. According to Jane, after the whole Ultron event, Thor, her ex-boyfriend, returned home to Asgard, only to find out that his brother, who was no longer a megalomaniac according to Thor, was still alive. Then a strange woman appeared, told them she was their long lost sister, and proceeded to fight them. This resulted in Mjolnir, Thor’s hammer, being destroyed and Thor’s strange experience on some trash planet called Sakaar. He managed to escape and go back to Asgard. Unfortunately, Asgard was eventually destroyed due to Ragnarok. He and his people, along with Dr. Banner and some friends he made in Sakaar, found a nearby planet that was habitable and began to rebuild their society, calling it New Asgard. He returned to Earth with Loki, Dr. Banner, and a new person named Valkyrie, or Val for short. He also wielded a new weapon, an ax he named Storm Breaker. Apparently he ran into some space pirates--morons, Thor had said to Jane-- that helped him create the ax. Unfortunately, the time Thor and his friends returned to Earth was during the height of the Accords debacle. Dr. Banner, recognizing Secretary Ross, quickly made a public appearance, claiming that Secretary Ross was the one responsible for creating the Hulk. After an investigation occurred, his claims were revealed to be correct. This appearance was greatly influential and made a huge role in the decision to retract the Accords. The world world managed to finally relax after the whirlwind of events began to die down. Gavin was just glad he didn’t have to worry about being killed or persecuted. Even though he didn’t really have any special powers, his skeletal hand would definitely raise some questions. In his current work, he decided to come forward and tell his friends about his hand. Much to his relief, they were quite accepting, although Jane and Dr. Banner poked and prodded at his hand a bit. 

A year past, and then another, and before he knew it, he had interned for Stark Industries for two years. This year marked his third. 2017 seemed to going well, and he couldn’t wait to see what the rest of the year had in store--

BOOM! The floor and the walls shook. Gavin immediately snapped out of his reverie. Thinking it was an earthquake, he quickly gathered up the files on the table before crouching under it with Darcy. After several minutes had passed, the commotion finally died down. FRIDAY began to speak.

“Boss wanted me to inform you that a chemical explosion just occurred two floors below you. No casualties occurred, but many people involved were severely injured. Because the explosion destroyed most of the floor, Boss has decided to move all workers from floors 80 to 87 to the Avengers Compound. All projects must continue according to Boss’s order. Accommodations will be given, and transportation will be free. Please pack your things and be prepared to move your equipment to the Compound.”

Gavin looked at Darcy, sharing a look of confusion. Chemical explosion? People injured? Moving to the Compound--

WAIT.

Moving to the Avengers Compound…? Where Bucky Barnes himself was currently residing? 

Gavin promptly proceeded to pass out.


	8. In Which Gavin Panics

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Gavin literally goes out of his way to avoid Bucky.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, I finally managed to finish this chapter! YAY! I do have to admit though; I'm not too impressed with myself on this chapter. I might edit it later, but for now it's fine. Also, I just moved into my dorm. I'm finally going to uni! I'm so excited, but this also means updating is going to be hard. Please understand that if there is no new chapter the upcoming Saturday, it's because I'm placing my academics first. Don't worry, I have the entire storyline written out, so I won't abandon the story anytime soon.
> 
> Also PLEASE listen to this song when you reach the last part of the chapter:  
> Full of Wonders by Vromance. It totally fits. Just listen as you reach the last part. You won't regret it!
> 
> Anyways, thank you for reading and have a nice day!
> 
> -Sloth

“I’m doomed, Taylor, I’m doomed!” Gavin wailed as he anxiously downed a shot of whiskey. He hissed as the alcohol burned his throat. He heard Taylor sigh on the other end of the phone. He was in his apartment, sitting on the floor in front of the couch as he watched his favorite K-Drama. He was swaddled in several fluffy blankets, and in front of him was a bottle of whiskey, a shot glass, and a TV remote. He groaned and leaned his head back.

“Gav, you’re over exaggerating. It’s been a couple of years since the whole thing with HYDRA went down. Don’t worry about it too much. I’m sure he won’t remember one measly intern.” To be honest, he highly doubted that. With those dark, strangely observant eyes, there was no way Bucky would forgot Gavin’s face. Gavin sighed and banged his head on the table. 

“An intern who literally waxed the Winter Soldier. And shaved his beard. And patched him up.”

“Wait, you patched him up? What do you mean?” Gavin groaned, but proceeded to explain anyways.

“I got asked to take his vitals one day after a nasty mission. The doctors and nurses were out because of a chemical explosion in the lab. But when I got over there, I saw how badly injured he was and couldn’t just step away, so I ended up taking care of his injuries.” There was an awkward pause.

“You were alone,” Taylor said slowly.

“Yes.”

“In a room. With the Winter Soldier.”

“Also yes.”

“Bruh, you should’ve taken that time to kiss him! Did you at least get a chance to see those sweet abs?” He could practically hear her wiggle her eyebrows. He sighed. 

“That’s not important right now. I have to find a way to avoid the Winter Soldier.” He heard Taylor moving around on the other side. He considered pouring himself another shot, but she would probably yell at him for getting too drunk.

“I’m pretty sure he’s too busy being an Avenger and hanging out with the other superheroes. You have nothing to worry about, Gav. It’ll be okay.” He absentmindedly agreed as he fiddled with his gloves. He ran a nervous hand through his hair.

He couldn’t help but feel a pit of uneasiness set in his stomach.

* * *

A couple day later, Gavin was settled in a small room on the Avengers Compound. It included a rather nice queen sized bed, walk-in closet, and a small bathroom. While the accommodations were nice, Gavin would rather be in his apartment. He couldn’t understand why Stark required him and the other employees to live onsite. Yes, the drive would be lengthy, but at least he would have the comfort of his own home and not have to worry about one ridiculously good-looking supersoldier rat him out to the authorities. Gavin plopped down on his bed, scrolling through Instagram on his phone. He debated whether or not to call Taylor, but before he could, he heard a knock on the door. He got up and opened the door. The person on the other side turned out to be none other than Darcy.

“Hey, finished moving in?” Gavin nodded. “Cool. Can I come in?” He moved aside to let her in. She bounced inside and jumped onto his bed. He huffed and rolled his eyes playfully. 

“So… we’re in the Avengers Compound. Guess who’s also in the Compound?” Gavin groaned, putting his head in his hands. “That’s right, your beefcake crush is here. I didn’t get to see him in person, but from what Thor told me, he’s pretty hot.”

“And?”

“Why don’t you go over and talk to him?”

“I can’t, Darcy. And you know why.”

“Gavin, don’t you think you’re being a little ridiculous here? 

“What if he recognizes me? What if he tells SHIELD about my experience with HYDRA? I’ll be kicked out of Stark Industries. I’ll probably be blacklisted by every company ever.” He felt his heart drop when he came to a sudden realization. He whipped around and grabbed Darcy by the shoulders.

“Darcy! He knows about my hand! Oh god, oh god, what if he tells SHIELD? I’ll be kidnapped and experimented on. I can’t EVER run into him again. My life could fall apart instantly if I meet him.” Darcy sighed and laid a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“Don’t worry too much, Gavin. He’s too caught up being sexy and an Avenger to even remember a little intern like you.”

“That’s exactly what Taylor said! But the thing is, unlike the other interns, I actually, I mean personally, waxed Bucky’s chest. Has any other intern done that? Has any other intern shaved the beard of a supersoldier, let alone patch up his wounds? Oh my god, oh my god, I’m so dead. I’m so dead.” He felt tears crawl to the corners of his eyes. He couldn’t imagine the consequences of meeting Bucky again. Darcy, seeing him distraught with fear, rubbed a comforting hand on Gavin’s back.

“Okay, okay. You don’t have to talk to him. It’s fine. I know it’s scary, but if he tries to tattle on you, remember that the Science team and I got your back. Taylor and your mom got your back. You have so many people that are willing to fight for you. He’ll have to get through us.” Gavin shakily smiled. Darcy went in and gave him a big hug. “Don’t forget that people care about you, Gavin. And I have a feeling that Bucky cares about you too. If he remembers you that is. I mean, you’re still alive. How is that even possible? I wouldn’t be able to deal with all that sexiness. I would die right there.” Gavin giggled, bringing a hand up to wipe his eyes. 

He highly doubted that the Winter Soldier, Bucky Barnes, would care about some wimpy little intern like him. Still, it made him feel better about his whole situation. Luckily, the labs were located in the west side of the Compound, and the Avengers’ living quarters were located on the east side. It seemed unlikely that there would be any chance of a fateful run-in when they lived apart from one another.

Oh boy, was he going to eat his words.

* * *

The first time he saw Bucky was two weeks later. Since there wasn’t a kitchen in his room, he had to go to the cafeteria for meals. Most of the time he went with Darcy since the Science Team were busy sciencing in the labs. Sometimes, though, they were able to wrangle Jane and Bruce-- “Why are you addressing me so formally, just Bruce is fine”-- from the labs and accompany them to the cafeteria. Today, it was just Darcy, and as they were walking toward the cafeteria, Gavin spotted the supersoldier in the corner of his eyes. He was sitting next to Captain America and the Falcon in a table near the window. Gavin immediately stopped walking. Darcy, not anticipating the sudden halt, ran into his back. She looked at him confused before finding the superheroes’ location.

“I thought you told me they don’t eat here.” Darcy huffed and blew a piece of hair out of her face.

“They don’t. They have a kitchen of their own… It literally doesn’t make any sense why they would eat here-- hey! Hey! Gavin, where are you going?” Gavin had already turned and walked away. Darcy caught up to him, but made no move to stop him. 

“There’s so many people in the cafeteria. He isn’t going to recognize you out of the blue.” Gavin scoffed and ran a hand through his hair. 

“Yeah, while that might be true, I’m not risking it. So bye!” Darcy groaned as he began to sped up. Damn him and his giraffe legs.

* * *

Gavin was on his phone laughing at a text Taylor sent him before he heard voices. He stopped walking and peered around the corner. He immediately clasped a hand to his mouth to prevent himself from screaming.

Down the hall was Bucky freaking Barnes himself and Steve Rogers talking with each other. It took Gavin awhile before he realized they were walking toward him. Gavin moved back and began to panic.

 _Nyet, nyet, nyet, what do I do, what do I do_ , he thought. He turned around and spotted a trashcan not too far away from him. Without hesitating, he jumped into it and almost slammed the lid above him. He held his breath as he heard them getting closer. His heart was thumping wildly in his chest as sweat beaded on his neck. He sat as still as possible, and he swore he felt his heart stop he heard their footsteps right outside the door. They passed without incident, and Gavin sat in the closet for a good 10 minutes trying to calm himself down.

 _Phew_ , he thought. _That was a close one._

* * *

Gavin was reading a book underneath the shade of a large tree before he heard footsteps on his right. To his horrid luck, he saw Bucky and the Scarlet Witch conversing with each other. He scrambled to his feet and dove into the bush behind him. He grabbed the book he was reading into the bush with him right before they stopped.

“Hey, did you hear that?” He heard Bucky ask. 

“Probably just a rabbit. Don’t worry about it.”

Gavin was about to let out a breath of relief before he caught the eyes of the Scarlet Witch staring at him. He sent her a pleading look, shaking his head slightly. Crap. 

_Please show me mercy_ , he thought. _I’m not ready to talk to him_. Flashes of him and the Winter Soldier passed through his mind quickly, along with recent conversations with his friends. _Did I actually think that?_ Almost immediately, she sent him a tiny nod and resumed conversation with Bucky. Gavin didn’t relax until they were completely out of sight.

Gavin crawled out of the bush and dusted himself off. He stood up and stretched, letting out a small sigh of relief. He jumped when a voice suddenly spoke in his head.

 _You will tell me the full story later_ , she commanded. Gavin nodded. Best not to anger the Scarlet Witch. Who knows what would happen?

* * *

The Scarlet Witch managed to corner him the next day when he walked out of the lab to get a snack. Just as he was about to turn the corner, she was there. He shrieked and made an attempt to step back, but she grabbed his wrist before he could, dragging him behind her until they reached an empty lab. She slammed the door closed and walked right up to him, close enough that their noses were almost touching. He stammered and tried to step back, but the Scarlet Witch grabbed his arms before he could.

“Who are you, and what is your connection with HYDRA?” Gavin anxiously floundered for words, his gaze landing anywhere other than the Scarlet Witch.

“Uh… um… my-my name is Gavin Willoughby, and I used to intern for HYDRA. They-they tricked me into believing that they were a tech conglomerate, and I worked for them for a couple of months during the summer. I took the job because I-I needed to science credits in order to graduate, and I didn’t realize they were a terrorist organization until my encounter with the Winter Soldier, I-I mean, Bucky. I ran into him several times in HYDRA.” Gavin finally looked at her with desperate eyes.

“Please don’t tell Bucky I’m here. I’m just not ready to talk to him. I just started my new life away from HYDRA, and I don’t want to risk being found out.” It took the Scarlet Witch awhile to respond. She pondered for a bit as Gavin squirmed underneath her surprisingly strong grip. Finally, she spoke.

“I’m sorry, but I looked into your memories when I was talking to Bucky. I see now that you are speaking the absolute truth, and as a friend to Bucky, that you mean no harm to him. You genuinely had no idea that you were working for a terrorist organization. And when you found out, you decided to do whatever you could to sabotage them. You even gave Bucky photos to help him recover his memories. You’re a good person. I won’t tell Bucky that you’re here.” Gavin sighed in relief. It was nice to know that someone was on his side, even though she practically rummaged through his memories. He was just glad she wouldn’t hand him over to SHIELD.

“Gavin?” He turned to her, puzzled. She gave him a slight smile.

“Bucky is a nice guy, I promise. You should just talk to him.” Gavin shook his head.

“ _Nyet_ , I’m afraid of what could happen. I don’t want to risk it. What if he reports me to SHIELD or some government entity? I can’t. I just can’t.” The Scarlet Witch smiled sadly and nodded in understanding. Gavin avoided her gaze, focusing on fixing his gloves instead. 

“That’s alright. I understand.” He looked at her and shyly smiled.

“Hey, Scarlet Witch, can I ask you something?” She nodded. He fiddled with his gloves then ran his hand through his hair.

“Yes?” 

“Please don’t go through my head without permission anymore. It feels weird.” She laughed and put a gentle hand on his shoulder. 

“As long as you call me Wanda.”

* * *

“What’s your deal with Bucky? I know you used to work at HYDRA, but that doesn’t mean you have a solid reason to fear him.” Gavin had just finished organizing the data of last week’s experiment when Bruce suddenly spoke. It has been two days since the lab incident with Wanda, and Bruce has been giving him confused glances ever since. Gavin sighed and leaned back on his chair.

“I… I was asked by HYDRA to wax him. It-It’s a long story, and I don’t really want to delve into it, but long story short, Bucky knows my face. I’m afraid if I run into him again, he might tell SHIELD about my connection with HYDRA, and I’ll be kicked out.” Bruce took off his glasses and looked at Gavin. His brows were furrowed and a frown was set on his face.

“Shit, Gavin, I’m sorry. Hey, try not to worry about it so much. I’m sure he won’t tell on you. From what I know, he’s a pretty nice guy. A bit stoic if you ask me. Besides, if you’re worried about that, Tony already found out and totally cool with it.” Gavin sat up and swiveled his chair around to face Bruce. His eyes were wide. 

“What really? When did this happen?” Bruce tilted his head and tapped a finger on his chin.

“When you just applied. FRIDAY found your profile within a HYDRA database after a raid. Tony went through it and even flew to your coworkers’ houses to talk to them. So all in all, he’s pretty okay with you here. He won’t let SHIELD find out about your connection I swear. You’re too harmless and nice to be evil like HYDRA.” Gavin scoffed and rolled his eyes.

“Thanks Bruce, you’re so supportive.” Bruce smiled and turned back to the files he was studying. Seeing Bruce smile made Gavin think about his old friends back in HYDRA. How was Jonathan? Was he doing well? Gavin hoped he was able to pay his father’s medical bills. And what about Dr. Seward? Was he really going to bring down HYDRA from the inside? Gavin sure hoped so. Dr. Seward didn’t stay in HYDRA for decades for nothing. The intern-- sorry, assistant-- thought about it some more as he went through the test results of another experiment. 

After awhile, he sat up and stretched his back. As he twisted his body, he saw Bucky walking towards the lab he was in. Gavin quickly swiveled back towards his work and angled his body so that his back was facing Bucky. He felt his heartbeat quicken and sweat beading on his neck. He ran his hand through his hair a couple of times, almost jumping when he heard the door behind him open. He ducked his head and eavesdropped on the assassin and the scientist’s conversation.

“Hey Bruce, have you seen Tony? My arm has been acting a little funky lately.” Gavin heard him scratch his chin. Gavin could hear the stubby hair underneath Bucky’s skin bristle as he scratched his face. Neck. Whatever.

“No, but he’s probably in his workshop. Something about clean energy being available to every person.” 

“Okay, thanks. See you around.” Bruce said a quick goodbye, and Gavin heard the door open and closed. Once he heard Bucky’s footsteps fade, he did a little victory dance in his chair. Success! Home free!

“Someday he’s gonna figure out that you’re here,” Bruce said. Gavin sighed as he flipped through his papers.

“I’m going to delay that day for as long as I can.” He heard Bruce sigh and turn back to his work. Gavin pushed up his glasses and fixed his gloves. What Bruce didn’t understand that it wasn’t just Gavin’s fear of being discovered and reported to government authorities. Every time Gavin saw Bucky, he felt his heart beat quicker and face feel warm.

Not that Bruce knew what it was like to have a crush on a supersoldier.

* * *

Gavin was scrolling through Instagram until he turned the corner and bumped into someone. The person seemed to be tall and muscular, judging from the way Gavin hit his chest. It honestly felt like running into a wall.

“Sorry,” he muttered, his eyes still glued onto his phone. He stepped aside and began to walk forward, only for a strong hand to grab his elbow. Gavin jerked forward, phone almost slipping from his grasp. 

“Hey man, watch it,” he said. He put his phone into his pocket and ripped his arm from the man’s grasp. He took a few steps forward until a hand grabbed his left wrist. A thumb gently brushed over his wrist, sending tingles down Gavin’s spine. He turned around, ready to give the man a piece of his mind. The words on his lips died as he stared into familiar brown eyes that gazed at him questioningly. All of Gavin’s thoughts came to a halt, and the only thing he could do was stare back.

The eyes roamed around his face, taking everything in. The man’s brow was furrowed in concentration. Finally, the man’s eyebrows softened and his eyes lit up in recognition. The assassin had finally reunited with his little intern. His lips softly spoke his name.

“Gavin?”

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, you can call me Sloth. I am new to Archive Of Our Own, and this is my first fanfiction on this site! Please feel free to review and leave constructive criticism. I would really appreciate.
> 
> Thank you for reading, and have a nice day!


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